Knowing When it’s Time to Change

Frustration Means Time for Change

Last week, I walked away from over 4 1/2 years of thrice-weekly ballet classes. I was getting frustrated with myself, and the classes in general. I’d hit a wall, and I found myself unable to scale it. Though I didn’t want to give up on myself, and the progress I have been able to make, I knew I needed to change direction. I’d developed a lot of bad habits in my effort to keep up with classes which, being mixed-level, will always be over my head, skill-wise, and knowledge-wise.

I hated giving up something that’s kept me stronger in body, mind, and spirit for almost 5 years, including through COVID, but my spirit was starting to suffer. I did some research and found a site which offers both live and on-demand classes where I can work at my own pace and up-level my beginner skills. Or more accurately, learn how to do correctly execute what I’ve been fumbling through for 4 1/2 years. Still, it took me nearly a week before I took to the barre once again. Now that I’ve started, I feel extremely certain it’s the right decision for me right now.

New Day, New Time, New Motivation

I spent over an hour on nothing but degage’s, piques, and envelopes. (that’s envelopays, not the thing you put a letter or bill in). The teacher started slow and easy, and built on both complexity and tempo with each succeeding video in the series. I might have stopped before bringing up the “speed drills” video, but left my barre in the middle of the room. I’ll go through the last one before the day ends. Best of all, I can come back to this series as often as I like, knowing I’ll pick up something more about the technique each and every time.

I know it’s difficult for a teacher in a room (or Zoom) full of multi-level dancers to break everything down for a beginner like me. It’s really up to me to find the resources I need to become a better dancer. Sure, I could opt for private lessons, but it isn’t really what I want to commit to right now. In fact, being able to choose (for the most part) when I want to study is the one concern I had, and is turning out to be the biggest benefit right now. Today, instead of having to wait until the class I was in started at 5, I pulled the barre out and did my first 65 minutes at 3:00.

My Needs, My Schedule, My Time

I also get to do a live class mid-day tomorrow, though it’s the only live class on the schedule I’ve calendared in so far. Until I’ve upgraded my technique, live, group classes will only get me so far. My level of frustration is the best indication I’ve gone as far as I can in a mixed group class until I back it up about 10,000 steps and work on not only using my core, but how I’m using it from one move to another. Just having it explained differently is already helping me focus more on stacking my vertebrae, or using my obliques for certain things.

I don’t like to think of this direction change as closing a chapter, but I have to allow for the fact it might go that way. For the moment (as I look at the clock and see it’s time for the first Monday night, Zoom ballet class I won’t be attending…by choice), I’m taking things one day, and one series of technique classes at a time. Whatever happens, I’m continuing what I started during the COVID shut down, and working on building a better me.

Grateful for Nudges Telling Me It’s Time for a Change

My gratitudes today are:

1. I’m grateful for finding the resources I needed when I decided to go rogue on my ballet studies.
2. I’m grateful for the motivation to move from regularly scheduled classes to self-study.
3. I’m grateful for the many things I’ve changed which are building a better body, mind, and spirit.
4. I’m grateful for knowing my frustration was simply the idiot light I needed to make a different plan.
5. I’m grateful for learning some things are only meant to work for me for a given amount of time, and that it’s up to me to recognize what’s no longer working, and find something new which will.

About the Author

Sheri Conaway is a Holistic Ghostwriter, and an advocate for cats and mental health. Sheri believes in the Laws of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income.