Learning to Be Like a Butterly
Living in the Moment Like a Butterfly
Have you ever sat and watched a butterfly fly? They flutter through the air carefree and unfettered, unconcerned by things like updrafts, or whether their wings will support them. Unencumbered by thoughts of what the next moment will bring. Will I be eaten? Will I catch the perfect wave of air? Will I splatter against someone’s windshield as I whiz through the air in oblivious abandon? Will I meet up with my mates for a game of tag? Or join a game with a bunch of strangers?
Butterflies live for the moment. Heck they’ve managed to go from caterpillar, to puddle of goo, to a lighter than air flying creature, all by simply being themselves—being in the moment. Why sweat the small stuff at this stage of their life?
Humans could take a few leaves from a butterfly’s book. We spend an inordinate amount of time thinking about what’s going to happen in the next bazillion minutes, and when things don’t go as we planned we fret about what we perceive as failures for the next bazillion. To what purpose?
Making Plans and Battling Failure
Are we happy while we meticulously plan for outcomes beyond our control? Do we find joy in rehashing our perceived failures? Do we stop to admire all the beauty around us, or recognize how many things go right when we get out of our own way?
Sadly too many humans focus their attention on the one thing they feel went wrong, ignoring all the amazing and wonderful things going on right around them every single moment. We spend far too little time on all the things in our life that are going right if not downright amazing!
Taking a Tip From the Animals and Insects
I sat on my front porch one Friday night watching cars go by carrying people 
home from work and into the weekend. Butterflies played tag through the tree boughs while a handful a pigeons pecked the grass for bugs. My outside cats lay amidst the overgrown weeds occasionally wandering over for a skritch. They, like me were more interested in watching the birds and butterflies soaring overhead than interrupting the pigeons’ pecking, for a meal they neither wanted nor needed.
Birdsong filled the air as the sun sank lower and feathered families settled into their nests for the night. But for the occasional whoosh of a car or hoot of a train whistle, it was just me, the cats, and nature settling down for the night. I’d accomplished a few things during the day. Maybe not as much as I could have but enough that in my eyes, the day was a success. Sitting on my porch watching the butterflies darting through the sky, and listening to the birds performing their nightly ablutions was exactly where I was supposed to be. It was exactly when I was supposed to be too.
The Journey is the Purpose
Even for me, moments like this are rare. I’m still learning to appreciate the value of allowing moments to pass without a plan, without an objective, and without a specific purpose. I’m conscious of the need to simply Be, but like most humans, fall back into old habits that insist I must “do”; must accomplish something with each of my moments. In reality, allowing myself to just Be is often accomplishment enough.
When faced with a major project such as the latest revision of my memoir, my first inclination is to grab paper and pen and draw up a plan. Even general wisdom tells me I must draw a kind of map so I’ll know how to get from here to there. Then, without taking a breath or looking around for other options, I have to dive in with both feet and start producing…something.
But sometimes the journey IS the purpose. How and when I get there is what I’m supposed to discover along the way. Yet how many times have I mistakenly assumed responsibly for setting the path, and blamed myself when it all went to hell? My mistake wasn’t in how or where I directed the train, but in assuming responsibility for setting it’s direction and rate of speed in the first place. It’s a mistake I’ve repeated over and over again throughout my lifetime. I’d like to say I’ve learned my lesson, but know sooner or later I’ll go charging in again when my role is really to follow.
Learning to Let the Universe Drive
Perhaps it’s just age which has slowed me down; has made the destinations 
less urgent. Perhaps taking the long way around is a bit of a guilty pleasure. Yet I’m finding as I do that. the long way around is getting me where I want to go just as quickly and a lot more easily than when I tried to force things or run the show.
The truth is, every time I tried to force the route, the speed, and the mode of travel, I ended up somewhere I really didn’t want to be. Over and over the Universe said “trust me”, and I replied “me do!” as I grabbed the wheel and drove myself off another cliff. Somehow the bumps and bruises failed to drive home to me where the real problem lay.
These days I have less stuff than most of my friends. I go to less concerts and take fewer trips. But I have something many of them don’t as they continue to chart their own courses and drive their own vehicles.
I have time to sit on my front porch watching the butterflies and listening to the birds with my cats who are far wiser than me in the ways of the world and the meaning of life. And sometimes when I do, a blog post or story writes itself—much like this one did.
Gratitude for Things Great and Small
My gratitudes today are:
- I’m grateful I’m learning to slow life down.
- I’m grateful I’m learning I don’t always need to be the conductor of my life and journey,.
- I’m grateful for quiet evenings to listen to the birds and enjoy the butterflies at play.
- I’m grateful for my cats who love a good snuggle and nothing more.
- I’m grateful for abundance; peace and quiet, joy, inspiration, appreciation, the little things, plans that make themselves, letting go, enjoying the ride, friendships that make me feel warm and loved, health, harmony, philanthropy, and prosperity for all.
Love and Light
About the Author
Sheri Conaway is a writer, blogger, ghostwriter, and advocate for cats. Sheri believes in the Laws , of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income. If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her Hire Me page for more information. You can also find her on Facebook Sheri Levenstein-Conaway Author or in her new group, Putting Your Whole Heart Forward
Once again, the world, and especially the US is in a turmoil over a hot button. This time, the button is (for the bazillionth time) abortion. Equally predictable is the fact it masks a much more insidious agenda: women’s rights and the current administration’s continued attack on Roe vs. Wade. Make no mistake. The decision in Alabama and elsewhere is nothing less than an effort to take women’s rights back to a time when women were nothing more than chattel, and of less value than a man’s livestock.
are buying into this load of hogwash because the men behind the plan know how to push the hot button called “abortion” and blow it so far out of proportion as to spread rampant lies about late-term abortions which, for the record aren’t abortions at all. They’re Births! Never mind the fact that in the words of 
Unfortunately, all too many are taking sides on the fake-news-fueled issue, failing to do their own due diligence (no real surprise there) and thinking legislation regulating what women can do with their bodies is a good thing!
to make decisions about their own bodies, and more, missing the entire point, exactly as the button pushers planned. While the shepherd sleeps, the thieves run away with the flock. Except, in this case, we are the sheep.
All too often, when emotions are triggered, I’m already taking the position the source is suspect and fueling it’s own agenda at the expense of the greater good. Then again, I fear the greater good hasn’t been a consideration for a very long time, and it’s supporters are being forced to put their efforts into keeping their own heads above water. The masses are being left without support or representation. History has shown us that turning large groups of people loose to fend for themselves after having their basic needs (food, shelter) provided for lifetimes leads to its own set of problems, both personal and social.
herself. There has been no warning or preparation; no skills learned or even a basic understanding of what needs to be done. Those who ensured the masses could survive and even thrive are now mired in garbage-filled bogs, fighting for their own lives, unable to offer even a minimal amount of guidance or support.
If you ask me, the world needs a pause button to give people time to catch up, breathe, stop reacting, and learn some of those critical skills so they can advocate for themselves and their peers. More, they deserve an opportunity to see the truth, and to properly dispose of all the garbage being flung. There’s still beauty and purpose underneath all the crap, but the chest-pounding, reacting, and internal fighting has to stop before we’ll see the flower pushing it’s way through the sidewalk crack.
the Laws , of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income. If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her 
Birthdays make me nostalgic. When another draws near, I seem to spend time revisiting memories, holding some close, releasing others. I listen to music from my younger days—songs that bring back simpler times.
words and the melodies. Even my daughters’ generation embraced the music of the Eagles, and Santana, as well as Queen, making it their own. The lyrics from those years still have meaning—still move me and made me feel. I think they always will.
Feelings of abandonment began long ago, when my sister was born. Maybe she truly was an easier child, or maybe my mom had just learned a few things about being a wife and mother. Either way, I became secondary. Though I’ve come a long way in the last few years, the songs make me remember the hurts still haven’t completely healed.
joys and sorrows, wins and losses. I’ve torn down walls I spent nearly a lifetime building, reinventing myself without masks or pretenses. Another birthday reminds me how far I’ve come. And I’m not done yet; not by a long shot.
My family didn’t understand me because I was different from the start. But I finally learned I didn’t have to gauge my success or my worthiness by their expectations, or their inability to love me the way I deserve to be loved. The lack wasn’t in me at all. They did the best they could with what they, themselves had been taught. It wasn’t their fault I knew deep down I wanted and needed more.
in the Laws , of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income. If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her 
Healing after losing a loved one to suicide is a lot like peeling an onion. Some layers are thick and solid. They require time, patience, and some effort to break through. Others are thin to the point of transparency, but sticky and hard to let go of. Some layers will flood your eyes with tears while others break your heart; the memories so sweet you want to keep them with you forever.
incredible people at Borderline Bar and Grill before taking his own life. It was a place I called home; a feeling shared by many others.
I’ve seen a lot of people and places claiming to be committed to helping those who have experienced a suicide as well as those who might be considering it themselves. Too often, I’m frustrated because their primary solution is to give you a number to call. In my opinion, if someone is desolate enough to be seriously considering suicide as an option, giving them a number to call, or posting an impersonal sign on a freeway overpass is confirming their mistaken belief that no one cares. It’s relinquishing responsibility to reach out to them ourselves.
feeling hopeless and disconnected—before it’s too late. They offer tools, support, and guidance to help recognize when one of your own is tumbling headlong into a pit of despair, and needs help arresting their downward plunge. They recognize a person in that state has already decided they’re not worthy, and the last thing they’ll do is ask for help. Even if help is offered, they’re likely to decline over and over, unable to believe anyone really wants to help them.
I didn’t have a village when I started the long, uphill journey out of the abyss not created, but exacerbated by my parents’ suicides. I only had 2 daughters who needed their mother, a stubborn streak that wouldn’t let me give up, and a penchant for writing.
in the Laws , of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income. If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her 
There’s a lot of hoopla and hype about gratitude these days, and for good reason. You’re grateful for things that make you happy, so focusing on gratitude means you’re putting your attention on things that make you happy. The more you focus on things that make you happy, the less you notice the ones that don’t.
you take a deep breath and say “thank you for my lungs”? What stops you from pausing to listen to the steady beat in your chest and say “thank you for the heart keeping a steady rhythm inside me”?
Let’s not stop there. What else do you typically complain about? Not enough money? Too little work? Too much work? Increasing costs? Unfair treatment? How can you flip those so you’re showing appreciation instead of complaining?
as you focus on your own assets and qualities. When push comes to shove, who is your strongest advocate? Your greatest asset? The one person you can count on no matter what? Yet who is also the last person you think to thank?
To me, gratitude is another way of saying “I love you” I don’t know anyone who couldn’t use more love, and though what we get from others is marvelous, what you give to yourself is both limitless and powerful. You can change your mood with gratitude, uplifting when you were despondent. Imagine how much higher you’d fly if the gratitude you expressed was for yourself, your body, your mind, your actions, your—Presence!
in the Laws of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income. If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her 
I don’t usually write or do much of anything besides going to the gym and running errands on Wednesdays, but for some reason I’m inspired to get the last May post written and scheduled a little ahead of time. Am I anxious to be in June? Not particularly. This year is going by fast enough without rushing into things.
anyway. There used to be days I’d bemoan my lack of inspiration, believing I had no good, creative ideas in my brain. By writing every day and not worrying so much about what comes out, I’ve learned the creativity is there. I just lock it up unintentionally at times. Writing what might to others seem like a bunch of nonsense loosens the clenched fist which holds those ideas hostage.
Our minds give us clues through our dreams. Of that, I’m certain. The clues may be completely nonsensical at times. They might just be telling us to be especially careful while driving that day, or there might be a repetitive number; a color that stands out for some reason; a name we don’t recognize, but which will be somehow significant in the next few days.
with the rest of my day, I have nothing more than a clear head and the beginnings of a plan for how I’ll be spending the day. If I get an idea or two for blog posts as well, I consider it a bonus.
I’m adding new habits to the list fairly regularly now, and often laugh at myself when I find a can’t not do some of the things which have become habits. As I de-clutter my home and my life, I both revel in the amount of clear space I have around me and rebel if I try to clutter things back up again.
but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income. If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her 
“When I’m 64 is Now!”
movies. But lately, they come after I’ve exerted myself with hours of dancing, or walking, or cleaning. And after a couple of days of doing nothing, I’m ready for a day full of activities again. Sometimes, it’s just gym and errands, others, I’ll add a few hours of cafe writing followed by a night of dancing. All serve to keep both body and mind sharp and flexible.
Today, I look out the window and see a flock of butterflies (or whatever a bunch of butterflies flying together is called) and I’m child-like in my happiness over seeing the brightly colored wings fluttering in and out of the branches of the plum tree before continuing their journey to who-knows-where? I master a line dance and feel a sense of accomplishment, though I’ve mastered hundreds over the years. Each new view, each new lesson brings me infinite joy.
increases from the simple act of spreading positivity knocked my socks off the first time I realized what was happening.
I’ve learned so much in my 64 years and am excited to keep on learning. Sometimes, though, it feels like about 90% of what I’ve learned has come in the last 5 years or so. In reality, the preceding years had their share of lessons. Many of them simply laid the foundation for the gigantic push I’ve felt in the last 5. Perhaps I took longer to lay my foundation than most, but then, I’ve followed a meandering path. I’ve visited a lot of places, but remained in few. I changed majors in college a few times, taking 10 years to actually earn a degree. Then I kicked my hard-earned degree to the curb, doing a 180 career-wise a little over 5 years ago. I couldn’t have done that without the places I visited, the lessons I learned, or the foundation I laid.
but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income. If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her 
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