What’s in a Dream?

Messages in Dreams

I had a dream the other night I can’t get out of my head. In the past, a dream well-remembered contained a message, though all too often, the message was something vague I was being tasked to figure out. This one follows the pattern, much to my frustration.

In the dream, everyone is involved in a quest of some kind. Each level has a color (1 is silver) and involves several puzzles the team must solve. As the quest had just begun, everyone involved was on Level 1 at one step or another, and had brought whatever knowledge and skills they had to the game. The end game wasn’t clear. All I really remember is that everyone played and each of us was on a team.

I seemed to be the most skilled person on my team, and though I don’t recall actually leading the team, I seemed to figure things out most often. We reached a point where I was suddenly pulled off the team, and handed several pieces of fabric in different shapes, all in a rust color. Somehow, we all knew Level 2 was blue, and Level 3 was rust, so I wasn’t sure why I was being given colors for Level 3 instead of, at best, Level 2.

A Solo Quest?

As the dream went on, I was suddenly walking along a road past all the Level 2 tasks, and I was walking completely alone. I somehow knew without being told someone or something wanted me to skip Level 2 entirely, and that I  had come into the game with all the skills that were supposed to be acquired in that level. Whoever it was also wanted me to be far enough ahead that none of the other people would be able to catch up with me.

Beyond that, nothing is really clear, and I have nothing going on in my life (that I’m aware of, anyway) which correlates to any kind of quest, competition, or leadership role. The fact that certain specifics from the dream remain clear in my head days later, when I didn’t write any of it down is the tricky part. It means there is something I’m supposed to figure out, and act upon. What that might be is anyone’s guess at this point.

As I’ve done so often in the past when faced with this situation, I’ve asked for clarification when I meditate, and tried to suss out more details while writing my Daily Pages…thus far, to no avail. I decided it can’t hurt to take it to a blog post where I often talk myself around to solutions, or can tap into the combined wisdom of my readers who might recognize the symbolism.

Looking for Clues

I do remember one of the pieces of fabric I was given was circular, and at some point, the miscellaneous pieces became some kind of clothing which identified me as having progressed to Level 3. The silence at this level was heavy inasmuch as I was the only person there, and for miles between me and the people still making their way through Level 1. The landscape wasn’t barren though. There were trees, and a unique terrain. There just weren’t any people, animals, or even insects.

Over the last few days, I did feel twinges of recognition where there was something in my life the dream was asking me to act upon, but even those twinges have faded back into the recesses of my subconscious, leaving only confusion in their wake.

Frankly, there isn’t a whole lot going on in my life at the moment. For the most part, I’m focusing on my physical health, and have seen a marked improvement in the pinched nerve affecting my left arm and shoulder, despite the long wait for Physical Therapy. Movement and stretching seem to be my best friends at the moment. I’m stretching every morning, and finding more reasons to get up and move throughout the day, whether it’s housework, cat care, or an extra day of errands. I suspect the first 12 sessions the orthopedist gave me will be more than sufficient to work out the rest of the kinks, where it used to take several months.

Focus on Physical Movement

Although improved physical health isn’t helping me solve this dream-induced riddle, it’s certainly moving one problem out of the way, freeing my brain to work on the dream rather than pain abatement. Granted, the drastic reduction in work-related responsibilities I encountered a few months ago has given me more opportunities to step away from the computer. The addition of a foster cat also means getting up more often to not only see to her needs, food and environment-wise, but to give her attention as she remains isolated from the other cats.

At this point, I guess I’ll continue focusing on possible quests, improving skill sets, and some kind of solo mission as those are the main components of the dream lodged in my memory. In a way, they seem to be poking at a locked door in my memories, slowly chipping away at the blockages preventing the door from opening. In some ways, it’s like a door that’s been bricked over, then covered with plaster. Maybe there was even a large piece of furniture in front of it for awhile that’s since been moved out of the way.

At the moment, the plaster seems to have been removed, and I’m facing a wall of bricks. I’m slowly chipping away at the mortar, and somehow know care must be taken to clear the doorway. Otherwise, I might already have tried blasting the bricks out of the way, or removing them with an air hammer. Whatever is hidden behind the door is somewhat fragile, and must be handled like the most delicate piece of blown glass.

Patience Revisited…Again

Once again, patience seems to be the game plan, calling upon all those still-immature resources in my virtual tool box. The answers to the riddles won’t come by bulldozing my way through, or trying to force the answers to appear full-blown. My normal tendency to blow past the steps from problem to solution won’t work here. Instead, I’m being asked to continue honing my still-developing skill of patience, while bringing into play those more mature ones of stubbornness and perseverance.

While I’m thinking I hope I’m up to the task, and won’t fall back on old habits of giving up when things get too hard, I know previous tests of patience have strengthened that skill beyond what it was when I allowed frustration to prematurely end a quest. If nothing else, this is another lesson meant to improve on a skill which, if no longer in its infancy, is still barely beyond the toddler stage.

Grateful for More Lessons

My gratitudes today are:

1. I’m grateful for the harder, more challenging lessons.
2. I’m grateful for messages, even if it takes me awhile to decipher them.
3. I’m grateful for opportunities to improve on my patience.
4. I’m grateful for quests, even when their purpose isn’t immediately clear.
5. I’m grateful for increasing opportunities to move my body.

About the Author

Sheri Conaway is a Holistic Ghostwriter, and an advocate for cats and mental health. Sheri believes in the Laws of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful. In her spare time, she’s also an accountant with extensive experience in Government Contracting.

Replace Addictive Behavior With Healthy Habits

Create Habits to Support Goals

In my mind, I set goals. Things like “I’ll edit another chapter of my memoir as soon as I’m back on schedule with my blogs.” Though I know both tasks are mutually exclusive, I treat one as a reward for achieving the other.

In fact, in some ways, I think I have it backwards. Getting to write another blog post or two is more of a reward for editing another chapter of my memoir than the other way around. Yet in my mind, this is the way it has to be. If nothing else, the blog has a solid, measurable deadline whereas I’ve yet to create one for the memoir that sticks.

As I mentioned recently, my current goal isn’t so much what I write every day, but that I write every day, not counting morning pages and daily gratitude posts. Actually, the goal is to write, or work on something writing-related every day for a decent number of hours though quantity isn’t specified.

Counting Successes Instead of Hours

I intentionally leave the amount of time open because I know it’s an arbitrary number, and has no bearing on how much I get accomplished. I’ve been known to knock out anywhere from 1000 to 3000 words in an hour, depending how focused I am, and how smoothly ideas and words flow from my fingers. Typing speed hasn’t been an issue for years. I’m one of the fortunate few who can usually keep up with a brain that emulates a runaway train most of the time.

The truth is, I’ve always been task-driven as opposed to time-driven. The idea of being in an office or at a desk for eight hours a day whether or not there’s work to be done has always made me itchy. I know I can get the same amount accomplished in four hours if left alone to focus and get it done. Often, I can accomplish more, despite my tendency to be easily distracted. That same trait also means I can hyper-focus until I finish whatever it is I’ve committed to completing.

I’m also not stuck in the rut which dictates work must be done between certain hours of the day. Some of my most productive times have occurred late at night, and well into the wee hours of the morning. Maybe it’s because distractions in those hours are at a minimum. Unless I’m communicating with people on the other side of the world, everyone who might be messaging me, or posting interesting bits that lead me from my productive path are safely asleep.

Sure, I have a couple of friends who are night owls like me, but most of the time, they’re using the same wee hours I am to accomplish their own goals so we putter happily along from our personal work spaces, leaving each other alone to create and build.

Thus the last thing I consider when I’m working on expanding the time I spend on writing pursuits is what time of day I’ll perform a certain task. For the most part, it’s simply a matter of telling myself I will sit and write/edit/research/study for enough hours every day to accomplish certain goals.

Opting for Healthier Choices

Even my goals aren’t fixed in time, space, or nature. Right now, my primary goal is to get my blog queue filled to its scheduled level again. Once that’s done, my goal will be three posts a week, simply to keep my queue where I’m comfortable, and my stress level is minimal. In fact, I’m looking forward to reaching that goal soon so I can add variety to my week again. Though I love writing and sharing my thoughts with you, I have so much more I want to accomplish.

Perhaps that’s why the blog posts are my chicken and vegetables right now, and other things are the hot fudge sundaes and pie a la mode. I know when I reach this goal, which should happen soon if I stick to my plan to work more hours every day, I’ll get the ice cream sundae or pie sooner rather than later, and even get to add sprinkles, nuts, and cherries.

It’s funny. I know all the whys and wherefores about setting habits, be they healthy, productive, or something else. It’s like an addict trying to disengage from the unwanted behavior. I have a hard time kicking the habits that keep me from setting a good, consistent writing habit. Perhaps that’s the key. Maybe the first step will be getting the chips and popcorn out of my sight so I’m not tempted to stray.

Unhealthy Habits Fill Time Without Substance

I have a lot of bad habits I’ve grown comfortable with over the years, but which yield nothing useful. I know I need to let them go. They’re like the ratty old teddy bear I refuse to give up even though he’s filthy, smelly, and has lost most of his stuffing. I know it’s long past time to give him a decent burial and make room for something more pleasing, but it’s hard to let go of something that’s grown so comfortable and familiar.

I guess the best approach is to not only work on setting the new habit, but in releasing, one by one, those which are getting in the way, taking up space, and keeping me from reaching my goals. I’ve been doing the work of envisioning my goals as complete, of feeling the joy of reaching the acme and being able to jump off into new and exciting adventures. I’m starting to see disengaging from my unhealthy, unproductive addictions is an integral part of the process.

Release and Replace

Photo-Sergio Aguirre via Flikr

Like negative thoughts and feelings, I have to find ways to fill in the space before the destructive behavior seeps back in; fill up on broccoli so there’s no room for chips so to speak. That, alone can be daunting as I’m so used to the laziness, procrastination, and self-destruction, it’s hard to throw up a wall to hold it at bay while I bring in the behaviors I want, and cement them into place.

It’s easy to grab for the popcorn, chips, and nuts that fill up but don’t nourish. Creating a healthy meal instead requires more thought and effort to create, and also to consume. It also gives me something to savor slowly, knowing it’s giving me the nutrients and energy I need to reach my goals. It seems no matter what you’re doing, the more thought and effort you put into a task, the better, more sustainable results you achieve.

When curing an addiction, the first step is recognition. You have to acknowledge what you’re doing is harmful to you in some way. Perhaps that’s where I’m at right now, or a few steps beyond. I’ve acknowledged certain behavior is undesirable. I’ve identified what I want to replace it with. I know it’s going to take a long string of baby steps. The next thing to do is take the first baby step, and accept it’s going to take time for the cement to dry.

Using Gratitude as a Place Holder

My gratitudes today are:

1. I’m grateful for my ability to self-examine.
2. I’m grateful I’ve learned about baby steps, and how they’re the key to making positive changes.
3. I’m grateful for my writing which is not only my goal, but my process.
4. I’m grateful for inspiration which somehow finds a way to flow if I get out of my own way.
5. I’m grateful for abundance; inspiration, motivation, determination, creativity, focus, behavior modification, love, joy, friendship, peace, harmony, health, balance, philanthropy, and prosperity.

Namaste

 

About the Author

Sheri Conaway is a Holistic Ghostwriter, and an advocate for cats and mental health. Sheri believes in the Laws of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income.

If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her Hire Me page for more information. You can also find her on Facebook as Sheri Levenstein-Conaway Author