Holiday Ho Hums

The Holidays are Here?

Here it is, the holidays again. My happy, happy, joy, joys have left the building. It’s not that I’m sad or depressed. I’m just bored of all the hoop-la…except for the decorations lighting up my neighborhood. I love those, and am going to miss them once Hallowthanksmas is behind us once again. It’s been a hoot taking my almost-daily 3-mile walks and checking out what the neighbors have added since the last time.

But despite snowmen, penguins, polar bears, Santas, Grinches, and more, I’ve failed to acquire even a touch of holiday spirit this year. The few gifts I bought for the grands were shipped weeks ago. I did have a lovely lunch with a friend with whom I exchanged gifts (eventually, I’ll get a picture of the beautiful water bottle she had made for me with an adorable picture of Scrappy Doo and Artemis).

It’s not really even about the gifts though. Work has been extra busy of late, both with end of the year activities, and a software implementation, so my focus isn’t even on it being a holiday other than the fact I’ll get a couple of days to work without interruption while the rest of the staff celebrates with family and friends. I have no real plans for the next couple of weeks other than work, volunteering, and my usual round of chores and errands.

Honoring Traditions

Granted, I’ll pull out my menorah and start lighting candles Christmas night, and I need to decide which establishment I’ll order my traditional Jewish Christmas Eve dinner from, to eat while watching more sappy movies. But there are times I actually do miss those crazy years…those trying to stretch a dollar while covering our gift list years when my kitchen was a frenzy of baking and gift boxes for a couple of weeks. I do not, however, miss the office Christmas parties; more a command performance than anything else, shared with people I had no commonalities with.

All in all, it’s kind of a mixed bag this year. There are things I miss from prior years, and those I’m glad I no longer revisit. I didn’t even party with my dance community this year, for reasons which I’ve belaboured in other posts, so won’t reiterate here. I love the friends I will be sending well-wishes too, and the kitties who snuggle with me whenever I’m not working, running errands, or doing chores.

Max has woven himself into the fabric of the inside community despite still needing to wear his cone until all potential areas for him to lick back open have healed up. Ishtar only hisses at him and his weird get-up occasionally now, but the boys have completely accepted him. It does leave Sable outside by herself, but she doesn’t go far, and can often be found right outside the kitchen door waiting for her share of attention, or a meal. Even the raccoons seem to have cut back on their nocturnal food runs.

Maybe it’s Too Quiet?

There’s an odd sort of feeling of anticipation, though heaven knows what might be on my horizon right now. Holiday high jinks are at an all-time low this year. Aside from the decorations and the holiday movies, they could almost pass without my notice. Without ballet or regular dance nights, I’ve settled into a kind of fugue state, punctuated by the usual things like food runs, volunteering, laundry day, and daily walks.

I suppose it’s the quiet life I worked for years to achieve, not knowing this is what it would look like. I’m not disappointed, nor am I overjoyed. Work and volunteering give me the sense of purpose I find I still need though; more since the only ones who truly need me at this point have pointy ears, and long tails. Even that’s OK.

Enjoying Being Not Needed

As I watch people I know dealing with family issues like aging parents, or helping raise grand kids, I’m selfishly grateful I have no such demands on my time. I come and go as I please with only a couple of things actually scheduled in during the week. Yet there’s a certain emptiness to my life; to my days; as well. Being needed is definitely a double-edged sword.

For now, I’ll be grateful for the time to read, write, watch movies, and snuggle with my cats; to take those walks with my friend; to work the schedule I want to instead of one dictated by another. I have Sundays to look forward to when I get to help socialize cats and kittens so they can find their perfect, forever home. At some point, I can add in a dance night or two, a ballet class or ten, and maybe even a date with myself. The beauty of this point in my life is the options are endless. I simply need to reach out and grab one.

An Attitude of Gratitude

My gratitudes today are:

1. I’m grateful for this quiet, if dull holiday season.
2. I’m grateful for my walking buddy who gets me out of the house when I need it most.
3. I’m grateful for my kitties who are happy, healthy, and snuggly.
4. I’m grateful for my friends who may be few, but they’re incredible.
5. I’m grateful for the traditions I still keep.

About the Author

 

Breaking the Procrastination Cycle

Taking Charge of the Procrastination Mindset

For the last few weeks, I’ve been struggling just to keep up, and even when I do have time to fill my blog queue, take care of administrative tasks, or even declutter.

I’ve put them off for tomorrow, which never comes. It got to the point where I gave up trying, and even missed not one, but two regular blog posts entirely before drop-kicking my butt back into the saddle.

What got me turned around and pointed back in the right direction, you might ask? The answer to my lack of motivation was a little decluttering, and a bit of rearranging.

Small Changes Lead to Large Improvements

I decided I wanted to put my UPS on the shelf underneath my computer, but because I move the desk back and forth for Zoom ballet classes, I needed to make sure the printer wouldn’t be dragged across the table, or unplugged every time I moved the desk.

After assessing my current setup, I decided the best approach would be to move the printer to a section of the dining room table adjacent to the computer desk, thereby ensuring the power cord would be long enough when the desk was moved.

To enact my plan, I had to go through the piles of paper which had accumulated on my dining room table/desk, weeding out things which either needed to be dealt with, trashed, or filed. Once done, it was a simple matter to move the printer and UPS to their new positions.

As an added bonus, I was left with a decent-sized piece of table on which to spread out paperwork while paying bills, or doing client work. It also helps that I finally got the changes I wanted to make to my health insurance implemented last week, after a month of struggling to figure out what I wanted, and where best to get it.

Seeing the Rewards in Change

In hindsight, I realize I’d simply grown bored with the relative sameness of my life, and frustrated with a few things fighting my attempts to wrap my arms around them, and gain a modicum of control over bureaucracy-ridden areas of my life.

Once I’d tamed a few bears, I could see I didn’t need a major change; just something that not only increased the functionality of my makeshift workspace, but made me feel like I’d changed things up, if only a little.

Unlike many who thrive on consistency, I thrive on change. When I experience too much sameness in my life, I tend to shut down, in a sort of minor rebellion over the rut I, alone have allowed myself to fall into. Thankfully, the intentions I’ve been setting, resetting, revising, and setting again have started to bear fruit, and the sameness I’d fallen into is already being shaken from its foundation, with more interesting and exciting changes to come.

I’m also easily frustrated when my ducks refuse to line up, even though experience has taught me the little suckers are more likely to run in different directions than respond to requests for order. The more something I’m working on depends on efforts from other people, the more likely it is to take longer than I’d like, and more often than not, piss me off in the process.

New Week, New Mindset

In a way, I think both frustration, and feeling stuck are what shook me out of the fog I’d settled none-too-comfortably into. Knowing I’d no longer have that nebulous place called “tomorrow” to push tasks into meant looking at how I’d been spending my days, and enacting changes which would lead to more efficiency and productivity.

It also helped to make some of the changes as a new week began. The physical decluttering led to clearing of less tangible tasks including making necessary phone calls I’d been putting off, writing blog posts that were due, not in a few weeks, but a few days, scheduling appointments, and overall, planning for the weeks ahead.

Other than doctor’s appointments and blog posts, I’ve learned through experience to refrain from booking myself too far ahead, but that doesn’t mean I can’t rough out a schedule to ensure tasks I’ve been neglecting of late will get done before I’m mired in holiday-driven responsibilities, complicated by on-boarding new clients, and giving them the necessary space in my schedule.

Buried by Boredom

Photo – Bev Sykes via Flikr

I’m reminded of the adage: “If you want something done, ask a busy person.” When my schedule lacked enough structure, and I wasn’t busy enough to keep my brain and heart happy, I fell into slovenly habits, promising myself I’d get to tasks which are purely for my own benefit soon.

Not enough to do is a real motivation killer for me. It doesn’t matter that I’ve made commitments to myself I’ve once again failed to honor. Nor does knowing life is getting crazier and more complicated help get me over the hump between sitting on the couch watching Hallmark movies, and picking up one of the many neglected tasks.

I can only be grateful my business has started gaining traction, and my intentions are starting to manifest. Knowing I’ll have less time to honor my personal commitments is the medicine I needed to awaken the child within and get her moving on the creative endeavors I’ve neglected.

Self-Inflicted Motivation

Photo-Yang Liu via Flikr

The tough part will still be motivating the adult who needs to do some deep cleaning, and take care of some minor repairs before the end of the month. I can procrastinate for awhile when it comes to writing, but I can procrastinate forever where household chores are concerned. The only saving grace these days are the habits I’ve formed around cleaning up the day’s messes; dishes, sandboxes, floors, and personal hygiene.

All in all, I’ve learned I’m always going to struggle with remaining motivated when the only person who suffers for failure to complete tasks is myself. Adding the needs of others to my mix means I’ll definitely get things done. The question is, will I be able to keep the momentum going so all my opportunities to procrastinate no longer tempt me to give up on myself yet again? Only time will tell.

Lighting a Fire with Gratitude

My gratitudes today are:

1. I’m grateful for things that kick me out of my ennui.
2. I’m grateful for motivation to get caught up on tasks whether for myself or others.
3. I’m grateful for a reasonably easy space to keep organized, assuming I don’t succumb to the excuse “I can do this tomorrow”, too often.
4. I’m grateful for the increased productivity I’ve enjoyed the last few days.
5. I’m grateful for abundance; motivation, inspiration, productivity, determination, attraction, clients, opportunities, peace, harmony, health, balance, philanthropy, and prosperity.

Namaste

 

About the Author

Sheri Conaway is a Holistic Ghostwriter, and an advocate for cats and mental health. Sheri believes in the Laws of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income.

If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her Hire Me page for more information. You can also find her on Facebook as Sheri Levenstein-Conaway Author