Navigating this Imperfect Life

Adapting to an Imperfect Life

Life isn’t perfect. In fact, it’s not even close. If it was, what would you have to strive for? What would be the purpose of hopes? Dreams? Goals? You need to have a reason to get up in the morning, even if for the moment, all you can do is maintain the status quo, and wait for conditions to improve. Even then, there’s always something you can do to improve yourself.

At times, your only choice is mindset, but as that drives everything else, it’s a great place to start, even when there are other things you can improve or change on the table. I’ve learned the best way to begin improving your mindset is with self-care.

Self-care is different for everyone so you have to figure out what works for you, but before you panic, it’s not hard to determine. What makes you feel good? Where are you happiest? When are you focusing on what’s right in front of you instead of doing the multi-tasker tango?

Variety is the Spice of Life

Another thing to keep in mind is it doesn’t have to be the same thing every day. Aside from my daily meditation, I have a number of things which take me out of my head and into the present moment where worry and regret are smothered, or otherwise displaced. Here’s a small sampling:

• Writing
• Reading
• Walking
• Working in the yard
• Cooking batch meals
• Sitting on the couch with a cat or two in my lap
• Hallmark and Lifetime movies (the sappy, boiler-plate romance ones)
• Dancing
• Strength training

Many of my friends have their own ideas, and things that relax them. For example:

• Fostering kittens
• Sewing
• Quilting
• Gardening (planting and nurturing rather than my preference for hacking away at things)
• Going to the beach
• Knitting

As you can see, the possibilities are endless. The only thing that matters is it’s something you do for your own health, enjoyment, and well-being. Though what I’ve listed here is predominantly solo acts, your happy place might involve doing something with others. Only you know what takes your stress and worry away best.

Setting Boundaries for “Me Time”

When gyms were open, and relatively safe from the spread of COVID, I was there 3 days a week without fail. I’d walk through the door, move to my first station of the day, gather my equipment if it wasn’t a pre-weighted machine, put my ear buds in my ears, turn on Pandora, and detach from the rest of the world. I called it my “me time”, and rarely interacted with others during the hour and a half or so I’d be there.

For now, I’ve given up my strength training, except the occasional visit with the minimal weights I have at home, but use that same hour and a half, coincidentally on the same days, to take a ballet class on Zoom. Essentially, I’m still in my own private place, though I’m following instructions from another person, but it’s in the comfort of my own home with no one else around. Mentally, I get the same benefits, though physically, I’d have to say what I’ve gained from 10 months of ballet is far greater than my self-directed weight workouts in part because I have someone else pushing me past my comfort zone.

The point I’m trying to make is I adapted to changing circumstances, and to what some might see as an imperfection. In this case, I replaced one thing with something I’m actually finding to be better for me—for now. Will that still be the case when everyone’s had their vaccines, and the risk of infection is mitigated? I’m afraid my crystal ball is on the fritz, so questions about the future are unanswerable.

Aspiring to a Life Devoid of Worry and Regret

Besides, the whole purpose of this exercise is to avoid worry or regret. Looking at what might happen in the future, trying to decide what I will or won’t do under any, or all possible circumstances is an exercise in futility and frustration, and defeats the purpose of stepping away from them in the first place.

I know what works for me now. I know when one activity isn’t available, I have plenty of other choices. I also know as time goes on, I might very well explore other options. What matters is the here and now. The rest will take care of itself when its time comes. If and when I have to make new choices, I’ll do it. Heck!  A year ago, working in the yard wouldn’t have made my list. Times change and so do I. You do too, even if you’re fighting a losing battle with change at the moment.

Ultimately, you have two choices. Drive yourself crazy, or adapt. Keep in mind, though, that fighting change is not only an exercise in futility, but guaranteed to make you more stressed and frustrated. Change is inevitable, and those who choose to adapt are not only stronger and healthier, but happier too. They live a more fulfilling and successful life, no matter how they define success.

Fighting Change is a Losing Proposition

Right now, a lot of people are either hanging on for dear life, or ranting and raving about not wanting anything to change. I have news for you. Changes have already occurred, whether you like them or not. If you’re still dreaming of going back to the way things where, whatever you think that might be, you’re deluding yourself in the worst possible way.

The past is gone, and some of us can honestly say “good riddance”. Standing in the way of change; of progress will only get you run over eventually. If you’re not ready to embrace change, and create a new reality for yourself in light of changes that have already occurred, at least step aside so you don’t get crushed as life passes you by. You’re as likely to stop a moving train by standing in its path as you are preventing change from not only happening, but affecting you in some way.

As for me, I prefer to be a change maker rather than a change watcher. It doesn’t mean I know right now how I’m going to do that. My strength lies in setting the intention, then watching for signs it’s time to make my next move.

Grateful for My Love of Variety

My gratitudes today are:

1. I’m grateful for my nature that allows me to embrace change.
2. I’m grateful for my aversion to ruts and stagnation.
3. I’m grateful for the ability to watch, wait, and learn. Everything happens in right timing.
4. I’m grateful for change even when it’s something I don’t particularly like. I’ve learned those changes clear the way for a better place; a better world. Sometimes, change has to be cataclysmic in order to clear space for something better.
5. I’m grateful for abundance; love, vulnerability. friendship, support, change, opportunities, motivation, inspiration, creativity, joy, persistence, peace, harmony, health, balance, philanthropy, and prosperity.

Namaste

 

About the Author

Sheri Conaway is a Holistic Ghostwriter, and an advocate for cats and mental health. Sheri believes in the Laws of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income.

If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her Hire Me page for more information. You can also find her on Facebook as Sheri Levenstein-Conaway Author