Rip off the mask, tear down the walls. Show the world my beautiful, vulnerable self!

Posts tagged ‘Western Medicine’

Compassion Learned by Experiencing Trauma

Minimizing External Trauma

https://www.flickr.com/photos/jobber1/36197048070/in/photolist-X9BkiG-6zNVTx-9WcJ3G-dSakbx-dSammr-9TBa8u-6ezpVp-4BqdWY-VXtGBZ-rmenXX-qCVBCH-ebSPFY-on6uCz-7jht6-n98ro-VTXW6M-a1XWoX-aEZ3ZC-GAd7om-aETqXe-5YRvvk-dSfWbY-KEWxyD-7N2mv7-s8WVRA-97x2ND-9FZG7n-kv3uih-7dAKBM-Usjf3C-emcpAz-3EXMtA-U3SSPP-gQb96B-6QtXTY-o36uJj-iwvCcv-54dBjc-opbQb3-7NxyBo-7G7U6q-cS6eML-9FXQcH-ojrwjj-SUbPcQ-7MNAUc-Ee2qD-jZRnbY-a355px-cS691NLong ago, I stopped watching or listening to the news, not because I don’t want to know what’s going on with the world, but because, quite frankly, I don’t want or need to hear about the horrific parts; the murders, the hate crimes, the politicians who use their positions to lie, cheat, and steal; the evil I know full well exists in the world. I also reject those who put their own spin on things until the facts become more the evolution of a  dystopian society comprised of the most horrific qualities ever exhibited by humans than anything resembling the highs, lows, and everything in between evident in the world at any given time.

In our digital society, the issue isn’t really staying informed. Everyone and their brother is happy to share their views of reality with you through every method available (heaven knows I’ve unfollowed quite a few who don’t take my more subtle hints, or fill their own news feed with obviously slanted rhetoric and downright lies). The challenge comes in filtering those messages so I see things that are:

  • Factual
  • Relevant
  • Non-partisan
  • Hopeful rather than hateful
  • Uplifting
  • Useful
  • Interesting
  • Kind

Granted, what fits into these categories is often a moving target, and especially with the first one, often requires some extra digging on my part before I accept what I read as true or valuable. All publications and sites are slanted at least a little. When in doubt, I’ll consult one (or more) of the sites that tells me which way the author of what I’m reading leans. If the topic is important enough to me, I’ll dig further to find accounts on both sides of the fence.

Just the Facts, Ma’am

One thing I don’t want to read are obviously agenda-based accounts from would-be medical https://www.flickr.com/photos/eamoncurry/28268951669/in/photolist-K52Lsr-byVMMC-RPS3xW-UdGABu-ZyoRJD-UGD7PB-F5Q7kv-VP4Csi-mHt88T-k3iA6-Hfjmzh-dcxTkQ-RtTnPj-U65Sq9-dcujdB-RSrN3T-bMQU4K-SWh6K3-Tb77Ki-T7xwTo-RTDHJ3-T7xp7w-3KKPDt-o6oKQv-SWh5YJ-UN97Sy-prgzdM-bMCdYe-qhS8Xz-byKj5d-qs4b7R-byL2XC-bMCd9p-SAfRWS-dzNBJu-fwWtJt-JjEtwP-bMBxtP-byKnuf-272uDNX-TuBQdv-26wihPC-EQiBwn-dabUNz-rLf7Sy-27u72yF-SLfJYB-dkAN6H-24szGFw-bWK2Xtprofessionals who lack the experience, the education, and the true desire to help others with no purpose other than genuine compassion. Sure, even doctors, nurses, and everyone else who chooses the medical profession has their own agenda, but in certain cases, I have to trust they’ve put it aside while they’re doing their job, else why take the Hippocratic Oath in the first place?.

Yes, I’ve had my own less-than-stellar experiences with Western Medicine lately, and I’m not a fan of Big Pharma, but I also agree there’s a time and a place to trust them, if not implicitly, at least far enough to stay out of their way while they’re doing their best to save lives.

Overall, I’m not a fan of bashing, even if I agree with you. I may vehemently dislike a public figure and everything they stand for, but calling them names, ridiculing them, or making mockery of them is neither productive nor does it improve matters. In fact, I believe it adds fuel to their fire. After all, even bad publicity is better than none. Many who are in the public eye thrive on attention. How better to reduce their influence than to avoid mentioning them at all?

Sure, there are times I’ll share something without researching it thoroughly because it makes sense to me, and focuses on an issue rather than emotions. There have even been times I ended up with egg on my face by failing to do my due diligence. Still, I’ll continue to share things which speak of hope, compassion, and humanity’s many beautiful qualities. I believe we need more reason to look upon each other with eyes filled with kindness, compassion, and love.

Interpersonal Relations Don’t Need to be Complicated

I suspect there are some who’ve unfollowed me as well. Some because they believe I’m uninformed, others because I won’t jump on their bandwagon over every issue on their lengthy agenda. There might even be some who find my outlook too hopeful; too positive. That’s OK with me. If I don’t inspire and uplift you; if my outlook is too airy fairy for your cynical heart, we’re clearly not a good fit anyway.

Past experiences influence who you are at any point in your life. I’ve had my share of trauma, misfortune, and loss. There was a time I let it influence what I did, said, and thought, and how I treated others. If I met the woman I was 15 or 20 years ago on the street today, I’d feel sad, and filled with pity for her. I don’t know that I’d engage her though. Her walls were high and negative energy flowed off her in waves. It took me a long time to let go of the anger and pain, and I’m not willing to allow myself to be sucked back into that teeming morass of misery.

I also know I am still easily triggered by certain things, and have to safeguard the progress I’ve made. It’s far too easy to let emotions take over, and to become that hateful version of myself I’ve worked so hard to heal. Thankfully, the healing process also gave me tools and the ability to see past the ugly behavior to the open, seeping wounds which make it so hard for some people to let go of conditioned behavior.

Humans Thrive on Hope and Compassion

More and more, I see people sharing messages of hope, community, and a shared journey. In short, we’re all in this together, and none of us is getting out of here alive, so why not find places where we can, if nothing else, meet in the middle? Hateful behavior only makes your own world darker and more miserable. I know this from my own experiences, though it took me a long time to realize the misery I floated in was self-inflicted. It might, at times have seemed like it was someone else’s doing, but it was more a case of attracting exactly what I was emitting.

If it seems like I’m ignoring the sadness; the suffering; the inequalities; the misery running rampant in the world, know nothing is further from the truth. I’ve simply made a conscious choice to refrain from adding to it by giving it my direct attention. I’m making small but consistent changes to myself which includes both the way I treat others, and the energy I emit into this sea of souls we occupy.

A pebble dropped into a lake sends out ripples which touch an infinite number of others as they spread, merge, and flow. You can choose to drop pebbles of misery and hate, and add to the putrid cesspool others have already filled. Or you can add the tiniest droplets of pure, clear water to the seemingly impenetrable mess. It might take awhile, but in time, the droplets of clean, pure water will make headway. I simply choose to be the change. What you do, and how you proceed is entirely up to you. Let your conscience lead the way.

Gratitude Heals Our Pain

My gratitudes today are:

  1. I’m grateful for choices.
  2. I’m grateful I’m able to filter what I hear, read, and see.
  3. I’m grateful I can follow my own path, respecting other people’s beliefs and attitudes, but ultimately staying true to myself.
  4. I’m grateful for friends who can hold opposing views, but respect each other enough to refrain from mistreating those whose views might differ.
  5. I’m grateful for abundance; love, choice, positivity, compassion, support, community, health, peace, harmony, hope, philanthropy, and prosperity.

Love and Light

 

About the Author

Sheri Conaway is a Holistic Ghostwriter, and an advocate for cats and mental health. Sheri believes in the Laws of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income. If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her Hire Me page for more information. You can also find her on Facebook Sheri Levenstein-Conaway Author or in her new group, Putting Your Whole Heart Forward

Health Wise: Fatty Liver. Should I Worry?

Liver Functions Baffle Your Average Doctor

In my long trek through Western medicine’s non-answers last year, one diagnosis came up, but was cast aside as unimportant: fatty liver. But is it really unimportant, or do our doctors simply not know what to do with it?

For answers, I followed a friend’s recommendation and purchased “Liver Rescue” by Anthony William. Instead of starting at the beginning (a process I immediately discovered had me yawning in minutes), I decided to jump to a chapter that addressed my immediate issue, the fatty liver, and read forward. It proved to be a wise choice as I quickly covered several chapters and gained a lot of useful knowledge.

After a few chapters, I jumped again as the author was taunting me with the promise of chapters on foods and herbs that were and were not good for fatty liver and the many other things you do to beat up your poor, overworked liver. The good news is, there’s hope, even for things you were born with as a result of the many things that come to you while still in the womb.

Understanding Cravings for Healthy Foods

I tried not to let myself get bogged down in the perilous trek through heavy metals, Epstein-Barr virus, and a dozen other seemingly insurmountable woes. Instead, I focused on all the things you can do to help your liver get out from under it’s seemingly insurmountable load of toxins. As it turns out, a number of things I’m doing are actually taking me in the right direction. Granted, I need to do more, but at least I’m doing things to help rather than adding to the problem with every step or bite I take.

It’s funny, because I’d found myself craving certain foods, and giving up others lately without any clear reason. In the last few weeks, I’d cut way back on sugar consumption, only succumbing to a craving for ice cream twice, and at well spaced times. I’ve avoided gluten, and limited my consumption of eggs and dairy. Most of all, I’ve had a mad craving for broccoli, celery, and apples.

As it turns out, broccoli is one of the many vegetables that helps the liver fight pathogens and harmful bacteria. Apples both hydrate and cleanse the liver, as well as providing an inhospitable environment for fungus, mold, yeast, bacteria, and viruses. Celery is virtually a wonder drug for the liver; hydrating, protecting cell membranes, and restoring bile production. In addition, the cluster salts in celery bind to all the nasty stuff your liver works overtime to protect you from. In short, celery gives your liver a much-needed break.

Healthy Eating Doesn’t Have to Be Unpleasant

I’ll admit, when I first turned to the chapters on food do’s and don’ts, I expected to find I couldn’t eat anything I really liked. While I learned (at least according to Mr. William’s research) that things like eggs, cheese, and dairy make my liver work harder, I also learned a diet rich in the fruits and vegetables I love, a limited amount of healthy fat like avocados, as well as things like potatoes, bananas, apricots, and cherries were beneficial to my liver in the first place, and could, given time and a few other not-so-onerous actions on my part, clear up my fatty liver, and even help me release those sticky pounds I seem to keep rediscovering.

I also learned I was on the right track with some of my supplements including CoQ10, Turmeric, L-Lysine, Vitamin C, and Vitamin D₃. While I’m not doing everything right at the moment, I’m certainly not on a fast slide into more serious problems. Still, I do need to alter my eating habits more before I see significant results.

There are things I do, like coloring my hair and excessive dependence on the microwave which are exacerbating the problem. But there are also things I either avoid completely or consume in moderation which add up on the healthy side of my balance sheet. Things like:

  • Diet soda (never)
  • Alcohol (once in a great while and always in moderation)
  • White sugar
  • White flour/gluten
  • Processed foods (as seldom as possible. Have you seen my freezer?)
  • Fried foods (my stomach goes on strike if I try)

Care and Feeding of a Healthy, Helpful Liver

https://www.flickr.com/photos/162733867@N08/29086322568/in/photolist-Ljg1m9-8b3Bcq-8dftDn-8mKHGw-kNJinr-7G5qTG-qqkYQy-8diVHq-icq54s-7G1vvv-8wSgbU-icquZX-7G5rPh-icquE8-icqcvj-dumDWG-c2Bg2L-9tJW5E-c2BjJY-dug3Ya-6CY1c7-F2Dn7m-6RgcKS-oTJEvg-myPgtn-5JppCu-b8Mizx-6zQ5G6-8mKTLQ-7KP9jG-dumDnj-8mGTPt-ryq1RH-sve5aR-7KK6Ec-4JjASd-9ATqPS-7KKbkz-8mGXFk-8mL5Ld-7RZ28J-4Jfkoc-8dfkdv-8mGyHH-8mGJdK-8afnPD-6Lg64e-biSy3F-pihYMh-8sRJY6Somehow, without realizing it, I’ve trained myself to deal with what may not even be a problem I started. According to Mr. William, you inherit a lot of your liver issues from our parents. In fact, in many cases you’re born with your liver already impaired by things like heavy metals and toxins which came from the bodies of your parents. It kind of reminds me of original sin. You pay for issues affecting your health through no fault of your own.

I’d love to blame all my excess poundage on an overworked liver, but let’s face it, I don’t eat right consistently. Some days I eat too many calories and don’t move more than a couple of thousand steps. Other days, I eat on the run, and get 12- or 13,000 steps in, but come home and eat something toxic late at night. I admit listening to my liver, albeit unconsciously for the last few weeks is making me feel better, but the numbers on the scale haven’t dropped much. I’m still inconsistent.

What I have done is revise the shopping lists I keep on my phone to include more of the beneficial fruits and vegetables listed in the book. My daughter’s timely gift of an Instant Pot will make it easier to avoid adding toxins to the otherwise healthy food by zapping it with microwaves. The Instant Pot is equally fast, and won’t poison my vegetables in the process (or at least I hope not). I’ve also pulled a selection of my healthy single servings out of the freezer so they’ll be defrosted and ready to heat on the stove instead of in the microwave.

Educating Myself

The challenge over the last year has been my discovery that Western medicine doesn’t delve deeply into the liver unless they find something major like cancer cells or cirrhosis. Unless fatty liver is severe, they brush it off. Their training doesn’t teach them to delve further into the things which cause things like fatty liver, or how it could be indicative of the need for dietary changes and supplements to help the liver do it’s job more efficiently. They aren’t well-versed at the thousands of functions performed by the liver, or how excessive need for its services can cause it to bog down. They also don’t seem to get the connection between viruses, the liver, and how dependent the human body is on proper care and disposal of toxins, much less, what constitutes a toxin.

I’m learning that as I age, it’s even more important to educate myself on both cause and cure, because my doctors are in the dark if it can’t be diagnosed with their machines and blood tests, or cured with knives or pills. Too often, the pills themselves contain substances which further poison my liver. MRI’s, CT Scans, and X-rays aren’t doing it any favors either.

There’s no way to go through life completely removed from anything that gets your liver jumping up and down in distress. That’s what it’s for; to protects you from toxins, excessive hormones, and thousands of other substances. It is possible to go back to basics and eat foods which help your liver instead of harming it. All it takes is a little information, and the willingness to treat the one body you’ve been given as well as you possibly can. It doesn’t have to mean going full vegan or vegetarian either, which, in my opinion have their own set of drawbacks and challenges for the liver.

Minimizing Toxicity with Gratitude

My gratitudes today are:

  1. I’m grateful for the availability of information nowadays. It makes it easier to figure out what’s best for me instead of relying on others to tell me based on what little they know.
  2. I’m grateful for friends who’ve done their own research and can shorten the time it takes me to find what I need.
  3. I’m grateful for options. I don’t have to accept a bunch of diagnoses that tell me nothing.
  4. I’m grateful I never developed a dependence on things like artificial sweeteners or sodas, and that I gave up habits like smoking long ago. While I still do things which aren’t as good for my body as they could be, I’ve been a lot worse too.
  5. I’m grateful for abundance; health, harmony, joy, love, friendship, community, literacy, inquisitiveness, mental acuity, advocacy, peace, harmony, balance, philanthropy, and prosperity.

Love and Light

 

About the Author

Sheri Conaway is a Holistic Ghostwriter, and an advocate for cats and mental health. Sheri believes in the Laws of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income. If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her Hire Me page for more information. You can also find her on Facebook Sheri Levenstein-Conaway Author or in her new group, Putting Your Whole Heart Forward

Letting Worry Slow the Flow

Ingrained Habits Unharmed by Worry

I was doing really well sticking to the schedule I’d set for myself. But health concerns pushed everything to the back burner until I got a few more answers (or maybe non-answers). When I finally sat down to write, thinking I was several posts behind, I found self-discipline had saved me. I had actually only slipped by one post with another due by midnight. No problem.

The problem isn’t so much with staying on track (and there are other projects which have indeed suffered), but with finding topics to write about which didn’t involve all the medical bullcrap I’ve been fielding for the last few months. Granted, the news so far is good in that it’s ruled out anything serious. But the search goes on and frankly, it’s frustrating!

I’m not a patient person by nature, so when each new set of tests has the current specialist throwing up his hands and sending me to yet another doctor with a 3 to 4 week lead time for appointments, followed by another 3 to 4 weeks to get in for the tests he orders, I’m losing what little patience I had. Meanwhile, the original problem persists, if not worsens, forcing me to make some lifestyle changes in order to cope with them until someone comes along who can actually answer the 64-thousand dollar question “What’s ailin’ me?”

Looking for Alternatives

Admittedly, I’ve grown more and more disenchanted with Western medicine the older I get. Someone recently said to me:

“As we get older, they see no reason to put forth the effort to keep us alive.”

I can find no reasonable argument to refute the statement.

Still, our insurance system is designed to support Western medicine, and of course, the pharmaceutical industry. I’m a lousy patient in that regard as I prefer herbs and healthier habits to the pills they try to convince me to take. I’ve had a great deal of success doing it my way too.

The latest concern seems to be confounding my doctors though, as they send me from one specialist to another only to hear “that part is working fine.” At least I don’t make this journey alone as a friend seems to be having the same issues, though he’s a decade older. In both our cases, our customary energy is being impacted, and as members of the dance community, energy loss is simply unacceptable.

Two Guinea Pigs Are Better Than One

I can only hope that between the two of us and our travels from one specialist to another, we’ll ultimately find someone who can figure this out, and solve the issue for us both. Meanwhile, I try not to piss and moan too much, eat smaller meals, and make sure I don’t eat within a couple of hours of dancing. One episode of nearly passing out was enough to make me a lot more cautious. (OK, so I could have stopped and sat down sooner, but I was having too much fun…until I wasn’t).

Some people choose to age gracefully. When they start slowing down, they take it lying down; sometimes literally. My friends and I are far less easygoing and accepting. If something slows us down, we look for ways to get around it. In my case, it’s daily walks, smaller meals, regular weight work, and when all else fails, physical therapy. As I’m still going at something close to my normal pace, I have to assume it’s working.

A friend of mine found his golf routine impaired by back pain. He added more stretching to his routine, and is back to golfing 5 or 6 days a week.

Keeping Up with the Younger Crowd

Admittedly, I’m not quite as active as those who are 10 or 15 years younger, but https://www.flickr.com/photos/perspective/9182552435/in/photolist-eZqYVz-bCNKVT-8waBnX-9gcXm3-5wMMcX-5styJG-5NdLft-9WfvLY-8MEH91-23XHouF-7mc1GH-py5mDy-9Lkh4X-7pd42N-EPatZ5-78st9q-6rcZxE-49Pm2N-au74m8-6jM6KS-HQymz-gVHz7s-49Kho6-5GKp9D-qSKDJ4-6wTpaT-6KMH5T-xp4AGh-38dnvK-Fkz55-a7uGEd-51eYV7-au74LM-co3BDW-e4KzTK-fPSmM-6PWBfU-eZqXRx-eZCkBd-5F7yao-PsCgD-7Rhx6c-BPHHeH-2e1ZPoa-6jvBPq-7Spp33-7RhwqR-2mKaF-78svmQ-7Spp6EI’m a lot more active than the average person who is 10 or 15 years younger, much less my age. Even my doctors are noticeably impressed at my activity level. That doesn’t mean they don’t add “for your age” to the end of any compliment, or refrain from mentioning my excess weight. Those are easy excuses inherent to practitioners of Western Medicine.

From what I’ve seen, herbalists and holistic practitioners are less inclined to bring age, or even weight into the calculation unless there’s something specifically age- or weight-related at issue. It may be an argument in and of itself to stop the merry-go-round of people who specialize in only one part of the body and consult someone who is prepared to treat the body as a whole.

Using Writing as a Sounding Board

Often when I’m writing, I’m trying to work out some kind of issue. Those are the pages, you’ll never see. Sometimes, I’ll talk myself around like I have here, and solve something that was bothering me, yet not to the point where I needed to do a brain dump to solve it. The mind is a powerful instrument, and like it or not, will point me in the direction I need to go, even if I didn’t realize I needed to go anywhere in the first place.

I’ve learned to listen to the intuition which surfaces through my writing. It usually brings something to the surface that needed to be brought up. Maybe I was spinning my wheels, or procrastinating, or in full avoidance mode. If I don’t acknowledge your presence, you’re not there.

I’ve learned I can’t hide from myself, though I spent decades trying. Eventually, the mind decides it’s had enough and says it’s time for you to acknowledge the elephant in the room, and do something about it. Today, my elephant is a health issue that no one seems to be able to figure out. Our society has made it necessary to advocate for ourselves, and to recognize when we’ve been put on a merry-go-round going nowhere.

Frankly, I prefer roller coasters to merry-go-rounds. They’re more exciting, and though the scenery might fly by at times, I get to see a great deal more of the world than if I spent my life going around in circles. I may be in for a wild, and at times, unpleasant ride, but I’m tired of all the non-answers. It’s time to leave the merry-go-round for the ones who have no place they want to go. That ain’t me.

Always Something to be Grateful For

My gratitudes today are:

  1. I’m grateful I have choices even if I have to push my way through the muck to find them.
  2. I’m grateful I’ve ruled out some of the more serious health concerns, though I realize there are still some which have yet to be ruled out.
  3. I’m grateful for friends who support and understand when I’m feeling frustrated.
  4. I’m grateful for my writing which helps me get aligned with where I need to go next.
  5. I’m grateful for abundance; choices, friendship, love, joy, dancing, solitude, community, opportunities, insight, inspiration, peace, harmony, health, philanthropy, and prosperity.

Love and Light

 

About the Author

Sheri Conaway is a writer, blogger, ghostwriter, and an advocate for cats and mental health. Sheri believes in the Laws of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income. If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her Hire Me page for more information. You can also find her on Facebook Sheri Levenstein-Conaway Author or in her new group, Putting Your Whole Heart Forward

Are You An Unconscious Empath?

Mind Numbing for an Unconscious Empath

Lately I’ve noticed a heightened awareness to my discomfort around people who are drinking excessively. For years I attributed it to living, first with alcoholic parents, and later with an alcoholic husband. I thought I’d developed a distaste because of the burdens it put on me to be in such a relationship.

As I continue to work through the healing process, which I realize now may or may not have been triggered by my parents’ suicides, I’m learning to look at people under the influence with different eyes. Let me first say I’m not talking about occasional social drinkers. My discomfort there is limited to those who get stupid and shrill. The ones with whom I’m most uncomfortable are the ones who, like my parents are carrying unbearably heavy loads of pain. They use alcohol to temporarily numb their pain, and in so doing, fling emotions like confetti once their personal filters are squelched as well. Anyone in their vicinity who is even remotely sensitive and not equally anesthetized is the unwilling recipient of the full-strength version of that pain.

Protecting Ourselves From Unfiltered Emotions

As one who is sensitive to the emotions and energies of others, I can tell you it isn’t a pleasant experience. Though my reasons are often misconstrued, I place myself as far from the seriously inebriated as possible, and set my shields on stun. Conversations with other Empaths and HSP’s support my own feelings about those who frequent a state of inebriation rather than face the reality of their own existence.

As I watch and listen from a safe distance, I see major correlations between my parents’ behavior and https://www.flickr.com/photos/collinj/28187872/in/photolist-3utgN-6dKm4U-ixFiym-Xq9zxX-5iV9vs-dvsbnZ-JbYbNS-9yYXge-oaNgSy-nTrTpN-5DJ9YU-5iV9S9-o8U3zy-5iQRZt-JtsRHZ-nTrL7c-o8TKcY-GBN8Sc-oaRENq-oaMYV7-nTrEwd-nTrPEK-oaWiFZ-6LQKXF-HEaAbW-rn2ZeD-7RzU6Z-o8TQhY-ocHiva-3i8NQ-pGH9jK-oaRGwW-2KqqNG-o8U285-ocH5JZ-FT9CLK-HoyT7a-HEazSu-9yYXvD-GzoDsW-o8TTDs-nTrEsL-9yYXMX-FALZgB-HEaAub-nTrNpN-9z2ZgE-J1HDTv-nTsq3F-GpK1YTthese outwardly happy drunks. It’s made me start asking questions:

  • Could they be trying to disconnect from pain that isn’t even their own?
  • Are there voices in their heads they can neither identify or locate?
  • Do they feel sad even when their lives are chugging along just fine, yet they’re not exactly depressed?
  • Are they afraid to ask the questions which might shed light on why they hear, see, and feel at inexplicably high levels?

In short, could these people be what I’ve begun to call “Unconscious Empaths”? To take it even further, could the term also apply to people who have been medicated because they experienced feelings they couldn’t control, or heard voices in their heads?

Finding Solutions Outside the Bounds of Western Medicine

Certainly medical science, with a few exceptions isn’t ready to admit that sensing thoughts and https://www.flickr.com/photos/clevercupcakes/4576733748/in/photolist-7YqXuy-22jbZb8-XZte3w-2E38fh-dtp56c-3NUNY-3NUP3-3NSUZ-3NSUK-VUxVut-aMjLSn-dUKkRp-4JpM4a-abD91G-932Hmu-8fJSDf-62xx8V-3c4zza-dUKms6-5AZhfv-dUQT8y-cPLm-3aqeS9-4NhLC1-4zty2J-4ttyNi-6U4fPj-3akHYp-3e21kE-6T47EL-obfTpE-3dWA6R-h2wXwy-7drB1P-ostgj2-6ieis7-a1LDFH-21n5r2B-q2i6g3-XScYar-dXwB6L-gQahXg-8EdGQ2-qFJcdw-YuGC4s-Jy7Cf2-28d1ChD-PHSfjW-x3xs87-MXhQbufeelings in others could be making people think they’re crazy. Few doctors are qualified to help someone distinguish the difference, much less learn how to manage energies, emotions, and thoughts which enter their hearts and minds uninvited.

A lot has changed in the last 30 or 40 years though. “Schizophrenia” has been replaced by other terms. “Bi-polar disorder” is far more common. Autism has been divided into multiple categories and degrees. Though we have a long way to go when it comes to depression, at least it’s being acknowledged as real and worth examining. Many may still self-medicate or simply withdraw. Those who seek help have a variety of pharmaceuticals at their disposal with no more than a subjective diagnosis and a doctor’s prescription. Both solutions mask the pain but do little to address the cause.

Reacting to Other Peoples’ Trauma

Yet how many of us will admit to having our mood changed the instant we entered a room or https://www.flickr.com/photos/whoisthatfreakwiththecamera/2128863889/in/photolist-4f7Z4P-qjFHFf-98uNgj-6rDocS-UiQVsw-9MwMca-Re3oF7-XGTMLU-on6pwo-SB9A6F-54qPeB-7H8Pz8-7SMaC-R6RucA-cdbJBE-XGU7Q5-bGtTU6-8YKrbu-4CRGDp-bfqo4k-PEvGt-6Q9zSA-mJQyHS-4Ew2AY-Sfkwdo-5vKK9X-aDJhs6-FWXiy-76To7V-PFoqM-6r9hiY-5YcHEt-bqFdZH-dzVpN2-df1Kzf-oG6Szg-oE5cau-49Ytgo-7dHNJe-76XiVw-5YcKbP-4S24ZU-5YcKtz-5YcJFF-bpo9oP-76Tjkx-4HL5yc-5YcJoT-8f2fwB-6km6Wdencountered a certain person? How many have experienced the bone-jarring sadness radiating off someone who wanders into our emotional range? Who can cite occasions when they’re having a conversation via private message when they can respond to the feelings of the person they’re talking to despite conversing with keyboard and computer screen from many miles away?

If you don’t understand what’s happening at least on a superficial level, you may question your own sanity. I’ve been there, and with no one to explain to me what was happening, I’d internalize what I was feeling and make it my own without a second thought.

Personal Care Means Sealing Our Own Field

https://www.flickr.com/photos/furyharbinger/13754521084/in/photolist-mXrvVf-i7tecw-ntZHNs-c2gN9S-ohigmk-57iTKB-73JEEv-s5JVaw-igW353-29rTSkk-XozdoG-qLfU2o-hi5jcs-bVGNFP-7Sb2wS-bVGNJP-NMwRpw-6B6c71-rna7La-bcDZX6-niW12j-2UhNhZ-8tsTnk-8J9aQL-78syKH-833Twc-kmyX4p-8m4vkZ-Y7u43B-4Uh1Sk-DKLQqd-a2nNnr-UZ1uqc-cR1ytd-mWjep8-XyM59F-9r3PkF-27UauY9-nw48YE-eNcN9H-WZoYde-VLKVRW-6SKYFi-9wm6oY-24cpFXW-MybNWR-2sEoYy-UcY7W2-CtGmWY-dmhqvAI will forever be grateful I learned a couple of things on my personal journey. One was how to shield. Though my first efforts were both clumsy and guilty of overkill, leaving me in a world devoid of true connection for more than 2 decades. I learned I could shut out what wasn’t mine. I’ve since learned to replace those impervious shields with filters which allow things like joy, love, and compassion to flow both in and out. Sadness, depression, and anger, are seen through a fine mesh screen. This gives me the opportunity to determine who they belong to and whether I can help the owner of the feelings without taking those emotions into myself.

Can We Become Addicted to the Misery?

Yet I’ve also become more aware of those who either can’t or won’t recognize they’ve become an https://www.flickr.com/photos/chrisyarzab/40513877112/in/photolist-24J5dbC-xLBnC-qDMybP-8uuvzF-er1tf-8S5Btn-5NYfwV-LihYBt-g4kBQ-S442nL-ceYb9U-g5JpWL-jTQZz6-cfHP9u-fauq5P-ahCCN2-isiMDz-6ViLeY-2EJXG4-HC2MUT-BU26S-5jegSL-VYGMA1-5j9Xzn-eB4adY-nBPSrp-5j9ZhH-dkoQLa-nbdfPZ-4FD4L1-dZ3Vjx-mbSGYM-dsW4Bs-6w75Kx-7sZRqK-8KRTG2-Mysc7N-LM2cLA-eXrUyD-faz3Az-dAR84B-8S8Fa7-7hKbWd-pYwhq-z2MhH-6jxdb7-261SwZS-ee4Pp7-vv8vw-8TKhq3over-saturated sponge for thoughts, feelings, and pain which belong to others. Some have even become almost addicted to bearing the misery of others. Like any addiction or problem, you must first recognize it’s there before you can take the necessary steps to fix or heal it.

I believe the first step in helping the Unconscious Empaths is to raise awareness. Like a variety of other topics I cover here, Empathy (capital E) is still gaining traction. Some psychologists and psychiatrists are aware of it and even allow for it to be part of a patient’s challenges. There are support groups on Facebook and a number of books on the subject.

Like everything else, though, if you’re unconscious, you don’t see how something like Empathy applies to you when you hear it from strangers. Only when someone you know and trust starts to describe some of the, for lack of a better term, symptoms, can you allow yourself to listen and take personal stock.

Testing the Waters

https://www.flickr.com/photos/142726605@N03/26477590124/in/photolist-GkJz5y-Lbjtyy-7U6aRM-fAvVrd-8xkhNA-9y8U87-9y8PZ9-hkmFEV-pFNVmn-qfvzds-4wXFCU-qwU8vr-fvtgHY-rrTvBA-qx26Jh-deDyEe-zLy9J-iyNxU-9y5Sva-zLy9G-nGtJKV-2ahmb-8GaT1p-8xhj1c-qfZurB-8xo6AA-o2vgjD-fhmvPA-i9LLEe-fhfA2Y-eyHAQ7-4wTwBV-fvthgq-4wQn2x-fvdZMM-fvuWFY-6Q1PWA-fP1Z3u-EjZqZV-daB9Am-aAFS2R-9y8RDE-fAvVAo-iSPYmR-6EKY95-4o5gjJ-6PDXe3-Kcbqcp-9aQUMa-75sAZqI’ve become carefully open about talking about being an Empath in the last few years. I’ll describe a situation and how it affected me, or talk about someone who is self-medicating with alcohol and suggest they may be experiencing pain and destructive emotions which belong to someone else. I used to be especially careful around those who were devoutly religious, but I’m learning Empathy doesn’t seem to conflict with those beliefs, at least with the ones I’ve opened up to.

It may even be that those who are deeply spiritual, regardless of their path are more open, not only to the idea of being sensitive to others, but to being that way themselves. Perhaps a willingness to believe in a higher power, or a greater whole, or some other description which gives us a feeling of connection to something bigger than ourselves is Empathy in itself.

Detach and Accept Without Judgement

The best way to learn and connect more, I’m finding, is to let go of judgement when I talk about Empathy; to detach from any beliefs I might have based on religious, political, social, or other deeply personal outlook. Discussions like this depend on openness without fear of humiliation or repudiation, and acceptance that whatever the listener believes is right for them. It’s been a difficult lesson for me, but ultimately, a rewarding one.

I’m learning those deep-rooted beliefs can’t obscure the fact we’re all connected, and more alike than we realize. There are a lot more Empaths and HSP’s out there than I’d originally believed. In fact, I’d venture to say it’s more the rule than the exception, even if some have yet to realize it.

We hear more and more about focusing on similarities rather than differences. It would certainly keep the arguments and dissent down. As I try to throttle back my own emotions on certain topics, I’m learning those similarities are far more relevant anyway. And I’m meeting more people who light up with recognition when I talk about Empathy.

With Heartfelt Gratitude

My gratitudes today are:

  1. I am grateful I’ve become braver about sharing my Empathic journey.
  2. I am grateful for the people who have come into my life to challenge, to teach, and to learn.
  3. I am grateful for an expanding social life that’s making it a bit more challenging to work on building my business, but know it’s actually a part of that process.
  4. I am grateful for my cats who keep my grounded and in touch with what really matters; a warm place to sleep, food in my belly, exercise, stretching, and someone to snuggle with whenever I need it. And kisses. Lots and lots of kisses.
  5. I am grateful for abundance; love, inspiration, friendship, joy, challenges, lessons, courage, steps out of my comfort zone, health, peace, harmony, philanthropy, and prosperity.

Love and Light

 

About the Author

Sheri Conaway is a writer, blogger, ghostwriter, and advocate for cats. Sheri believes in the Laws of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income. If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her Hire Me page for more information. You can also find her on Facebook Sheri Levenstein-Conaway Author or in her new group, Putting Your Whole Heart Forward.

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