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July 18, 2015 Musings From a Mind Drugged out on Dance

A Body Satiated With a Night Well Danced is Fertile Ground for a Pondering Mind

I sit here unwinding and pleasantly exhausted from a night filled with the laughter of friends and an overdose of dancing. While my body sinks gratefully into the chair, my mind jumps up like a kid on a sugar high, dashing hither and yon. It ponders the events of the day, of the week and how so many things, so many people are simply connected.

The spiritual community has, for many months now, been both vocal and consistent in the prediction that many souls will choose to leave this year. Though we’ve seen many celebrities move to that great stage in the hereafter this year, many of those who left were simply old and tired. They’d been practicing their craft, entertaining the masses for decades, so their passing in their 80’s and 90’s wasn’t really much of a stretch.

So too is it true that, despite the seeming coincidence of three friends losing a parent in the last week, old age and failing bodies is still the logical explanation. Though my parents are long gone, many of my friends are spending a large portion of their time caring for aging parents these days, knowing that they won’t be around forever, and treasuring whatever time they might have left.

My question would encompass the younger, healthy people who die tragically like the four Marines felled by a terrorist earlier this week or a child killed by a drive by shooter; a young mother killed in a car accident or a kazillion other accidents and heinous acts which take the lives of people who seemingly had so much left to do with their lives.

Who Can Really Say Whether It Is Accident, Choice or Fate?

Yet, I must ask myself, Is it possible that even those killed tragically chose that time, that place to send their soul on a new journey? For those who are new to my blog, or only read the occasional post, you may not be aware that I’m a firm believer in choices, including those which determine time for what we humans call ‘death’. I also believe that our souls take many journeys, and perhaps not all of those are human, nor are all of them taken on Earth. I cannot provide proof for my beliefs any more than a religious person could prove to me beyond a shadow of a doubt that there exists a being they call ‘God’. Some aspects of our Faith, our Belief System can be proven (or disproven) scientifically, but the question of where our souls go when our human body expires is, thus far, not one of them.

Ergo, if we can’t prove for certain where the soul goes, how can we prove whether or not it leaves a body by choice, by fate or by accident? I do enjoy debating this with friends of different belief systems, but only those who agree that we are not trying to convince each other, or prove our own beliefs, but simply share and give each other new ideas to ponder. To be honest, part of the development of my own beliefs came from opportunities to compare and contrast those of others without pressure to conform. In fact, there are probably nearly as many ideas from my Spiritual but not Religious friends which fail to resonate as there are from those who follow a particular religion.

Everyone’s Beliefs are Right…For Themselves

Though I truly believe that whatever a person believes is right, as long as they understand that it may not be right for me, I’ve gotten myself in trouble a few times with this viewpoint. I’ve encountered those who feel very strongly that their beliefs are the only right way. My first reaction to this is to try to argue with them. WRONG! Just because they believe theirs is the only way by no means affects me or my beliefs. They can think they know what’s best for me from now until the end of time, but in reality, they don’t get to choose what’s right for me anyway, so why belabour the point?

You want to call on a deity you’ve named ‘God’ and insist that he guides you and takes away your problems if you let him? Great. I’m happy that works for you. You want to call it ‘prayer’ when you send thoughts of love, comfort and healing to someone? Perfect! I call it something else, but the end result of both our thoughts is the same.

The concept of souls moving from place to place, body to body is certainly not shared by everyone. I have friends who subscribe to the “one soul, one body” concept wherein the soul and the body will be reunited at some specified point in the distant future. That seems a little morbid to me, but who am I to say they’re wrong? It’s certainly simpler for them as they don’t feel the need to ponder the question of accident, choice or fate like I do.

For now, I’ll send healing energy to those who have lost a loved one, knowing that they’re sad, regardless of how or why the loved one passed. Grieving is a normal human process and, like Sadness from the movie ‘Inside Out’, it serves a purpose. It allows others to reach out and offer comfort and it builds bonds. It’s also something most of us, at least by the time we reach a certain age, can certainly relate to.

I don’t have an answer to my question yet, and the year is still unfolding in all of its crazy glory. I think it will take at least a tiny glimpse of why those choices are purportedly being made before I can reach any conclusions which will satisfy my constantly enquiring mind.

My gratitudes tonight are:
1. I am grateful for the people in my life, whether they be like minded or offer a completely different perspective.
2. I am grateful for choices and for diversity. I no longer feel weird being different. I simply revel in my own personal uniqueness.
3. I am grateful for body numbing nights of dance which get the mental juices stirring.
4. I am grateful for the lovely, lengthy downpour and the cosmic light show we enjoyed today.
5. I am grateful for abundance; love, dancing, friendship, ideas, laughter, joy, health, happiness, peace, harmony, choices, prosperity and philanthropy.

Blessed Be

I’d appreciate your taking a moment to visit my Facebook pages at https://www.facebook.com/SheriLevensteinConawayAuthor?ref=aymt_homepage_panel and https://www.facebook.com/HLWTAccounting . Please also drop by my website, http://www.shericonaway.com and check out my Hire Me Page. I’ve created these pages as a means of positive affirmation and would be very grateful if you’d “like” them or leave a comment! Thank you!

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April 27, 2015 A Different POV

What if Everything We Consider Normal Was Reversed?

An article I read today about George Takai’s guest appearance on The Big Bang Theory got me thinking. Apparently, one of the stars of the show blurted out to Mr. Takai something to the effect of “did you know you’re gay?” It led me to think about his ardent support of the LGBT movement and further, what those letters signify. At the risk of oversimplifying, it occurred to me that those letters represent labels which our society gives to people who don’t adhere to what is “normal” in their selection of sexual and life partners.

Given that so many of our social mores came into play when the Catholic church rose to power, I had to ask myself, what if the world changed such that heterosexuals were now the minority (perhaps to curb overpopulation?). How would it feel for those who now assign labels to others to be the ones assigned a label and to have that label used in a derogatory fashion?

Judging people by their sexual preferences is a fairly modern concept anyway. In ancient Greece and Rome, nobody really thought twice about it. The only consideration was that the nobility produce heirs. What they did beyond keeping the line going was their own business and not subject to public scrutiny. If you ask me, this is one of many areas in which we’ve gone backwards. If two people are happy together, why is society entitled to judge? (Please note, I’m not condoning pedophilia here. I will always believe that the term “consenting adults” must be part of the equation.)

Speaking of Point of View, I’ve Been Giving Some Thought to My Career Path This Week

Although I am doing what I would do if money were no object, the fact of the matter is, I’m starting to be concerned with outflow exceeding income. I’ve been looking at various ways to monetize some of what I do to allow myself time to do what I would do for nothing (and frankly, for the moment, I am). I went through a course about making money freelancing, and put so many of the things into practice, if I hadn’t already done so, but am still coming up mostly empty handed. Part of the problem is my own confidence in what I know. I limit myself to what I’ll even consider pitching because I think I don’t know enough about the subject.

Granted, I don’t know real estate or law which seem to be overly represented on the job boards seeking writers. But after exchanging thoughts with fellow freelancers, I see that I know about a lot more things than I realize. Though I wouldn’t consider myself an expert, I can talk intelligently about natural remedies, healthy eating, single parenting, divorced moms, accounting, government contract accounting, bookkeeping for small businesses, Quickbooks, pet therapy, ailments affecting cats(more from having experienced a lot of things with my own fur-kids than anything else), solo spirituality, meditation…the list goes on a lot further than I would have thought. Through my own healing process, I have also become fairly well-read on the subject of suicide, both gaining an understanding of what can motivate someone to take their life as well as the healing process and challenges the surviving family faces.

Since many sites want a conversational style in the writing, I can truly say that my own voice and style are very conversational. So, what’s the problem? Why am I not getting this going?

Insecurity: The Biggest Killer of Inspiration and Creativity

That’s right, folks. It’s my very own, personal lack of confidence. In other words, I, myself am shooting me in the foot. Pretty stupid, huh?

I tried the Elance route but found that the jobs consistently went to people who had been on the site for awhile. That, alone killed my confidence as I felt I couldn’t compete against those who already knew how to play the game. So, how do I go about developing the skills to play with the big boys?

It all comes down to one thing, and something I’ve inadvertently been practicing by blogging and novel writing for the last few years. Practice. The only thing that will help me play in the big leagues and start getting paid for at least some of my writing is to suck it up and start pitching; to keep writing and building my portfolio; to listen to what others have learned as they followed a similar path to mine. But most of all, I need to stop stressing over how fast my nest egg is dwindling because I’m focusing on lack.

I know it on a conscious level, but seem to have been doing a lot of backsliding lately. So I am setting a new intention today. I am going to remind myself every day that I am grateful for everything I have and that what I have will always be enough. Plain, simple and to the point. I will close the door on feeling envious of anyone else’s life, stuff or anything else. As I said to a friend recently, so and so has a lovely figure but I wouldn’t trade my more round shape for what she’s gone through in her life. What that is doesn’t matter. I’m simply saying that we only see the outside of people’s lives. We don’t really know what challenges they’ve had to face. We are given our own challenges and develop our own strengths. Heaven knows, I’ve had enough lean years to have learned how to get by until things ease up again.

I am following a conversation in a Facebook group called The Careful Cents Club. A woman voiced what I’ve been thinking about insecurities and making my freelance gig work. I said that I’ve even considered looking for another accounting job, but when I think about it, I get sick to my stomach. She echoed those feelings. If there’s one thing I’ve learned through my studies of spirituality and healing, it is that our emotions tell us what is good for us and what isn’t. A sick feeling in the stomach is the first sign that we need to turn around and reassess. For me, gut reactions are very clear, even when I’m drawing Tarot cards. When I come to the one I need to pull, I’ll feel a little twinge in my stomach. It’s not a sick feeling like the one I get when I consider going back to an accounting job, but more of a pull of excitement that says Yes! That’s the one!

What do you do when insecurity and fear of doing the wrong thing plague you? Do you have rituals? Do you talk to a certain person? Do you make lists of pros and cons? I’d love to hear how you work through those feelings and come out the other side with renewed resolve.

My gratitudes tonight are:
1. I am grateful for everything I have. I am blessed with a roof over my head, food to eat, cats and friends to love and the best daughter a mother could ask for.
2. I am grateful for the bouts of insecurity which force me to step back, reassess and recognize when I’m being too hard on myself.
3. I am grateful for the ability to recognize that I alone am stopping my forward progress and I alone can fix it.
4. I am grateful for all of the words I’ve put on pages over the last few years and, in fact, through my entire life. Some may eventually reach publication while others are simply there to help me find focus or healing.
5. I am grateful for abundance: love, inspiration, like-minded souls, meditation, kitty love, friends, persistence, the ability to see the positive in everything, harmony, peace, health, prosperity and philanthropy.

Blessed Be

And now for some shameless self-promotion:
I’d love it if you’d visit my Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/SheriLevensteinConawayAuthor?ref=aymt_homepage_panel and my website, http://www.shericonaway.com. I’ve created these pages as a means of positive affirmation and would be very grateful if you’d “like” them or leave a comment! Thank you!

December 9, 2014 Can a physical reorganization help to re-set the mind and spirit as well?

How does a life reboot really start?

I have a spiritual shelf. I have mentioned it on several occasions and have even included this picture more than once. 3f968-spiritualshelf But today, after doing my daily tarot reading and reading Elizabeth Peru’s Daily Global Tip-off for today, something prompted me to re-arrange the shelf.

OK, I’ll admit, it wasn’t merely “something”. As I might have mentioned, I recently changed the format of my daily Tarot Card reading. When I first started, I pulled one card from my Spiral Tarot and wrote something for each of the categories, I see, I feel and I think. As time went on, I started adding a card from Doreen Virtue’s Angel Therapy Oracle cards. Fast forward to earlier this year when I started looking at the card I cut when I replaced the Tarot card into the deck. During each evolution, I looked at all of the cards pulled to see if there was a common thread. Sometimes there was and sometimes there wasn’t.

Out with the old and in with the new!

There came a point in mid-November when I felt that the Angel Oracle cards were no longer serving me. At that point, I decided to make use of the rest of the Tarot decks I’d purchased over the years but never used (with the exception, I admit, of the Rider-Waite deck which I just don’t “feel”!  Though, as I re-read this sentence, I realize that I must, at some point, give R-W another chance.). But since I’d gotten into the habit of pulling two cards from different decks, I decided that the second pull would be from my old, familiar Spiral Tarot. I continued with the reading of the cut card, but this time, from both decks.

Which leads me to today’s sudden need to reorganize what is, essentially a small space but with a huge amount of energy. I pulled a deck from the shelf which happened to be in a flimsy white box. This may only be significant to people who’ve purchased Tarot decks, but typically, this type of packaging is used when the deck is accompanied by a book. After completing my reading, I decided to find the book which belonged with the deck (which, in case you’re interested is the Romanian Tarot, a deck in which the characters are portrayed as Gypsies).

As you can see from the picture above, the shelf had become a helter-skelter mess of books on a variety of spiritual topics from Tarot to Laws of Attraction to Psychic abilities to Kabbalah, though, until I started pulling the books and decks down, I didn’t quite realize what a collection I’d amassed.

When a reorganization becomes a revelation.

As I removed book after book from the shelf, I found myself saying over and over “So that’s where I put it!” and “I didn’t realize I had that( that many) books on that subject!” After a couple of iterations, I put everything back, but left “The Secret” and “The Laws of Attraction” books in front at first, before realizing that what I wanted was to have the front layer of books all relative to Tarot, with my decks filling in the empty spaces. Surprisingly, there was exactly enough space to accommodate my decision. Spiritual shelf-revised

Meanwhile, when I found that I had several books on Kabbalah hidden on the back of the shelf as well as a copy of the Holy Scriptures, I retrieved other books I’d purchased more recently to put all books on the topic together behind the Tarot books. Also hidden behind the Tarot books and cards is my complete collection of “Laws of Attraction” books and “The Secret” as well as books on psychicness and Wicca. The end result was that I re-familiarized myself with what, precisely, is in my collection. And again, everything fit perfectly.

Something else which practically jumped off the shelf while I was relocating and consolidating my collection of books dealing with spirituality in one way or another was an old, dog-eared copy of “Seth Speaks”. This book actually has a double significance to me, as it was the first series I read about channeling, and was probably where my interest was first piqued to eventually do so myself. But the book also came up in discussion with my massage therapist and friend a couple of weeks ago. Something tells me the time has come to revisit my old friend.

Sometimes, dissatisfaction with where you are or where you’re going is the strongest motivator to change.

I’ve been doing a fair amount of soul searching lately about where I was, how my income generation was going and whether I was still on the path I needed to follow. The biggest question was, “Is copywriting really for me, and why am I really pursuing it?” The biggest question was whether I was pursuing it, albeit sporadically, because it was something I really felt called to do or because it has a better potential for generating revenue. When I realized it was the latter, I knew it was not the means to the end I seek. But where do I go from here?

Yesterday’s vet bill brought it home to me that I am still a long way from making expenses, and that my bank accounts and investments won’t carry me through forever. But I have not yet lost faith in my ability to do what I love, make a difference in the world and be financially stable (which includes, I have to add, large donations to organizations like Cat House on the Kings). I even found myself looking for property for sale which would give me a large house in a piece of property which would afford me the space to create an artist’s colony and a cat rescue. I found and printed out a place which has a 2200 square foot house and 13 acres overlooking the beach between Ventura and Santa Barbara. Though it wasn’t the mountainous, self-contained place I’d originally envisioned, it is actually even better! My affinity with the sea and my love of open spaces would both be met. The pictures are now on my Vision Board (and a few things which don’t belong have been moved).

My stomach is bouncing in anticipation of a buckle-your-seat-belt-and-hold-on-tight, E-ticket kind of ride.

I am a strong believer in synchronicity and know deep in my gut that all of these seemingly disjointed changes and shifts are signalling an even greater one, sooner rather than later. I was about to say, “I only hope I’m up to the challenge” when I realized that if I wasn’t, I wouldn’t have chosen today to start reorganizing and preparing to do some reading. In fact, as I look at the shelf beside my spiritual shelf, I see possibilities for more reorganization, this time with the reference books I’ve been collecting that relate to writing.

And now, my entire body is tingling with anticipation!

As they say in New Orleans: laissez les bons temps rouler!

My gratitudes today are:
1. I am grateful for synchronicity.
2. I am grateful for nudges from the Universe to rethink and reorganize.
3. I am grateful for the faith I’ve kept for over a year now in my abilities to do what I want and need to do.
4. I am grateful for the time to devote to my health, my animals and my family.
5. I am grateful for love because it is truly what unites us all.
6. I am grateful for abundance: love, joy, inspiration, guidance, anticipation, evolution, changes, challenges, harmony, peace, health and prosperity.

Namaste

October 4, 2014 Shifting Energies #shericonaway #blogboost

The spiritual side of me takes in a lot of information.

I tend to seek insight and guidance from many sources: some are from within; my own guides, Higher Self, etc. Some are from without: sites like Power Path and Elizabeth Peru’s Deltawaves. I take all of the information I receive each day, weigh it, feel it, see how it resonates. Through it all, I maintain a healthy dose of skepticism, just to keep myself from flying off in one direction or another because one of my sources was especially adamant about something.

Tonight, despite my skepticism, the discussions about how Earth’s relationship to Mercury, the planet of communication, would be affected for the next few weeks gave me a rather intense confirmation. For about the first hour, my dance friends and I were a very high energy group. There was a lot of chatting and laughing, dancing with gusto and dashing back and forth between conversations. But suddenly, it was as if someone just pulled a plug and everyone’s energy just swirled down a cosmic drain. At first, I thought it was just me, but as I looked around, my friends were moving more slowly and without their usual vivacity. When I mentioned it, my suspicions were confirmed. Now, according to various sites, this particular Mercury retrograde is about slowing down, looking back, clearing out old stuff and finishing things we were working on in mid-September.

As I understand it, the hours surrounding the juxtapositional shift between Earth and Mercury can be either energy chargers or energy vampires. Clearly, at least where I am, the vampires were flying.

According to Elizabeth Peru: “This weekend will start out with a bang. Many people feel over tired or come down with sore bodies and headaches or migraines. Why? There is so much electrical charge in our atmosphere that the brain may overload and need a break. Drink lots of filtered water to stay hydrated and alert.” She goes on to say that we need to look back at what our major themes were on or around September 14th, as that is what we will be revisiting.

If I were a normal person, I would just shake my head and say “As if I can remember what I was doing or thinking two weeks ago? I’m lucky to remember what I was doing two days ago!”

But as you may have noticed, I’m anything but normal, and have chronicled my comings and goings with more and more consistency over the past few years. It was a simple matter to go back to my blog post for September 14th where I found:


My goal for the next few weeks is to get some of the longer term tasks off of my to-do list and to revise the format a bit so that I can generate graphical data from the weekly progress. If I were writing a spell to ensure success, I would, at this point add: “As I will, so mote it be.”

In fact, let me take a stab at it!
Completion of the tasks at hand
Be they exciting or rather bland
Motivation is what I seek
Triggered by the words I speak
To trim my list by one, two or three
As I will, so mote it be!

Inspiration is definitely flowing more freely this week, and tasks I’ve left hanging are seeming less daunting now. I’m getting encouragement from many directions, and stepping out into opportunities which have recently begun appearing (or more likely, I’ve finally just opened my eyes to see what was already there, awaiting my notice). So many things swirling in this vortex of my life, that make it impossible to avoid feeling and joining the pace as it speeds up once again. It’s been awhile since my life was a wild roller coaster ride, and it feels as if that wheel is about to turn and the wonder and excitement is being turned up a few notches. Stay tuned as the ride will be interesting, exciting and sometimes frustrating, but never, ever boring!

At this point, there should be haunting music playing in the background or maybe just a flashing lightbulb signaling yet another “Aha Moment”. Either way, I clearly turned a page on the exact day Ms. Peru states that we will be going back to our choices and decisions of that day as we progress through this Mercury Retrograde.

My internal skeptic would say: “Maybe there’s something to it, and then again, maybe there’s not. Who am I to say for sure? You’ll just have to do what you always do: take it one day at a time and see how it all shakes out!” Either way, I am branching out and looking for new avenues with which to make my book progress. I am getting ready to develop a new plot and set of characters come November 1st. And I am knocking some of the bigger projects off of my To Do list. (and yes, I did move it to Excel so that I can start creating graphs and tables of my progress!) The baby steps are certainly starting to join together into more substantial steps. The question remains, where will they be taking me?

Of one thing you can be certain: you’ll know very soon after I do!

My gratitudes tonight are:
1. I am grateful for “aha moments”.
2. I am grateful for evenings out with friends, even if the energy shifts downward halfway through.
3. I am grateful for a shift back to my healthier habits.
4. I am grateful that I’ve been getting out into the world a lot more lately, in spite of my Hermit tendencies.
5. I am grateful for abundance: energy, excitement, new beginnings, completion of old tasks, love, joy, harmony, peace, health and prosperity.

Namaste

Check out my Author’s page at https://www.facebook.com/SheriLevensteinConawayAuthor?ref=aymt_homepage_panel  Feel free to like and follow the page as, slowly but surely, I’ll be adding more content, including information about the books I’m working on!

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