March 19, 2015 Like Dust in the Wind

There’s a lot of crazy energy out there right now. Can you feel it?

It took me awhile to realize a couple of things. First, not everyone dreams in technicolor with larger than life images and scenarios, only to remember the entire thing when they awake. Second, there are a zillion different energy sources, generating both high and low levels at all times. Third, not everyone is sensitive to the energies, and even those who are, are sensitive to different things in different ways.

Me? I tend to take my cues from my cats. If it is stirring them up, chances are, it’s stirring me up as well. This goes for earthquakes, solar flares, thunder storms and many other energies not directly attributable to humankind. Unlike my cats, or maybe simply because they don’t get out much, I also react to the energy in a room. Is it joyful? I’m buzzing with the joy of it. Is it angry? I’m feeling like I’ve been buried under a ton of dirt. Is it contentious? I’m probably going to find my way to the nearest exit. Is it uplifting? You’ll find me front and center, just soaking it all in.

I bring this up because we’ve had some serious energy explosions over the last few days, and kids, it ain’t over yet! Bad enough, our dear Father Sol has been tossing off pockets of energy large enough to dwarf the earth, but it comes at a time when the Moon is getting into the action by moving close to us, the weather is massively unpredictable (a few days ago, the weather service was predicting temps in the 80’s in my area. For the last two days, we’ve barely hit 70, it’s been overcast and in some places, there was rain and rainbows!), and to top it all off, there’s a solar eclipse quite literally on the horizon.

So, what does all of this gobbledy-gook mean to the average Joe?

The average Joe is probably oblivious, not only to all of these conflicting energies building, multiplying and at odds with each other, but he’s probably adding to the chaos by allowing his own emotional energies to run unchecked. But for those of us who are sensitive to one or more of the energy sources, Space Mountain at Disneyland seems like nothing more than a spin on the merry-go-round right now. I can’t speak for everyone, but I can tell you that the peaks and valleys I’ve been hitting for the last week or so make me incredibly grateful that my work seldom takes me out of my own little cocoon, and when it does, it is often where like-minded people can be found.

It is, however, putting a real damper on my exercise routine, so I’m looking for other outlets until the storm passes. I can manage one, maybe two days out and about, but more than that and I start twitching like an epileptic in full seizure, but my twitchiness is only visible to those who can see such things.

For those who have or do come in contact with me right now, please trust me when I tell you that if I seem distracted or withdrawn it is only because I have focused my attention on maintaining the shields which normally need little or no attention, but right now, they are being challenged in ways I’ve truly never seen before.

Even more sensitive than me and others like me, are the animals.

I can only imagine how this is affecting my cats. I see them acting out or racing around the house one minute and curled up in a cuddle puddle the next, but no matter what they are feeling, there are always at least two of them sticking very close to me, and when I do go out, they are waiting at the door, nearly frantic from wondering when I’ll be back. Even my two ratters wait impatiently for me to park my car so I can reassure them that the world is not coming to an end, but is just swallowing itself whole so it can spit itself back out all bright and shiny and new.

As I left the club where I dance tonight, someone said to me “I guess you’ll go home and go to sleep now?”

I had to laugh. Even under normal circumstances, I’m rarely in bed before 1 and am typically up by 8:30. I laughed even more when she said that 8:30 was really early. For me, after years of getting up around 6:30 or 7:00 to work in an office, 8:30 is a luxurious sleep in! Because of the crazy up and down energetics around me, I actually tried to go to bed early the other night, turning in around midnight. What I got for my trouble was an hour or so of tossing and turning and a raging migraine in the middle of the night. Clearly, it is not the will of my body and HEF to settle that early. I am a nocturnal creature, after all.

It’s after midnight now, and this is when my Muse starts kicking up her heels. This is when I finally figure out something to blog about or find a way past that plot block which has had me avoiding my book for the last few days, or spending an hour writing page after page about one of my characters as I make an effort to get inside the head of someone I simply cannot relate to. More importantly, this is when I most easily shut down the side of my brain that wants to check the spelling of every word, the grammar in every sentence and altogether screw up the creative process. That side of me gets to see the light of day and the finished draft only when I’m ready for the nit picky editorial stuff.

It’s the middle of the night when at least some of the crazy energy has found a home for the next couple of hours that I truly do let my Muse and my ADD run totally amok, and we have an incredible time doing so. I think fondly of the nights I was up until 3 AM, cranking out 8,000 words in a five hour writing marathon. I find ecstasy in the plot twists which seemingly come out of nowhere when my internal editor is fast asleep and blissfully unaware of all the rules we’re breaking. And I fall madly in love with some characters while falling madly in hate with others.

In the light of day, I read excerpts from the stories of my fellow Inklings and wallow in depression, honestly believing that I’m not half the story teller they are. But in the dark of night, I am a creative genius and I am invincible. But I lied. The crazy energy is anything but dormant right now. I feel it whirling around me, a hurricane picking up bits and pieces of human-kind as it slips unnoticed between the cracks in our houses, the cracks in our minds and the spaces in our hearts. If it was evil, I’d call it insidious, but this energy is more like a curious, hyperactive child. It samples this and tastes that before losing interest and moving on to something else, unaware of the havoc it leaves in its wake.

Fortunately, I have learned to soften the effects on myself in the hours before dark gives way to dawn.

The healing class I took a year or so ago didn’t take me where I thought I wanted to go at the time, but instead, it gave me so much more. It gave me self-awareness, the courage to take my leap of faith, and most of all, tools to use when I needed self-healing or an energy barrier to set me apart from all of the chaos. In the last couple of weeks, I’ve found a new technique which I came upon quite by accident. My spine was incredibly tense, all the way up into my skull. I found myself spinning energy around my spine, starting in my skull and working downward, focusing on each area individually, moving on only when the tension had subsided. With a little practice, I was able to create these spins of energy wherever I might need it on my spine. I simply stop for a second, think about the place which feels tense and soon, it is sheathed in spinning, healing, relaxing energy. I can only believe that this technique came to me when it did because there was a need. One thing I’ve learned is that if we get out of our own way, the Universe will provide what is needed when we need it.

The word right now is “Release”

The crazy, chaotic, conflicting energies carry one message which is common to all of them. “Release old habits, patterns and things which no longer serve you, or we will release them for you.” I’m neither foolish enough nor cocky enough to ignore their message.

My gratitudes tonight are:
1. I am grateful that the Universe intercedes on my behalf.
2. I am grateful for my sensitivity to energies, no matter how uncomfortable it might be at times. Without that sensitivity, I would miss too much and take a great deal longer to learn my lessons.
3. I am grateful for new techniques which, as time goes by, show themselves to have multiple purposes.
4. I am grateful for my cats who stick close while I’m scrabbling around trying to remain somewhat grounded.
5. I am grateful for abundance: love, joy, life, integrity, imagination, chaos, energy, change, harmony, peace, health and prosperity.

Blessed be.

And now for some shameless self-promotion:
I’d love it if you’d visit my Facebook page at https://www.facebook.com/SheriLevensteinConawayAuthor?ref=aymt_homepage_panel and my website, http://www.shericonaway.com. I’ve created these pages as a means of positive affirmation and would be very grateful if you’d “like” them or leave a comment! Thank you!