Hermits Come Out of Hiding
After spending 3 of the last 4 days not only behind the closed doors of my house, but behind my closed eyelids about 20 hours out of 24, I’m feeling decidedly restless. Waking up to a slightly overcast but basically sunny morning, feeling almost as good as new again after being laid low by what I can only assume is the latest strain of flu, I’m feeling strangely disconnected and, dare I say it? In need of a people fix.
As a self-professed hermit, people aren’t usually high on my list of outside stimulation. Not that I don’t go out fairly regularly amidst the humans. But as much as possible, I find entertainment where people are few. My workouts are timed for the less populated periods, as are my weekly errands. The less people between me and my objectives, the better.
But after two entire days when the sum total of my human contact was a few text messages and one person stopping by for her Girl Scout cookies, I’m ready for some real, honest-to-goodness human interaction. Then my inner responsibility kicks in saying: But you’ve gotten nothing done for days. You’re behind on all your tasks, and need to stay in and catch up!
The Never-Ending To-Do List
Never mind that I have all cross-posts to Medium done for the month of February, or that this is the final blog post for the month too (and it’s only the 12th!). I have a book to read, blurbs to create, schedules to make for those blurbs, a summary to write, and at least a dozen other tasks I can think of if I put my mind to it. After a couple of days of doing nothing, my mind ignores what’s done and rushes straight to the endless list of “undones”.
Needless to say, the desire to be around people is quickly overshadowed by the never-ending To Do list in my mind. Yet a small piece of me says: Surely you can spare a few minutes. Walk to the store or go sit in a coffee shop. Something so I know I’m not alone in the middle of Humanity’s crowd.
The little voice is drawing closer and closer to a whine, my most hated of human vocalizations. More hated when it’s coming from my own inner voice. Perhaps I could pack up my laptop, clean off the bed dust, even wash my hair, and go to a local Starbuck’s or the like and do some reading or writing there. If only to shut the little bugger up so I can get some real work done.
The Mind is Willing, The Body, Not So Much
Just when I think I have myself geared up to make myself presentable to the outside world, reality sets in. Though I was up earlier and have kept going longer than I had in the last couple of days, the truth is, my energy is still low. I’m still eating far less than I’m used to (which isn’t a bad thing), and after about 4 hours of wakeful time, I’m ready for a nap or meditation; in short, some shut-eye. The mind is willing, but the body says: nuh uh!
So I exchanged a couple of texts, posted or shared things on Facebook (another place I’ve been noticeably absent lately), and honored the needs of my depleted body. I comforted myself with the knowledge that I’d get to go to the gym and run errands tomorrow (and maybe even talk to people for a change!), and meet my friends at our temporary dance home tomorrow night.
Until then, I’m giving my To Do list and Trello board the respect they deserve. I’ll cross off a few more tasks in between naps so I can still have the work-free zones at their regularly scheduled days and times. This uncharacteristic need for human interaction will have to wait its turn in my personal Grand Scheme.
Do Other Hermits Sometimes Feel Un-Hermit-y?
I do have to wonder if other hermits (aka writers) have moments when they’ve been out of touch for so long the need for other people becomes almost a palpable craving? When they know if someone called and offered up just about any kind of entertainment, they’d drop everything, throw responsibility to the wind, and go.
It isn’t only illness which locks us into our hovels for long periods of time either. Sometimes it’s our writing. We get into a zone which can last for days; when eating and sleeping are secondary and the words roll off our fingers like water from a gushing spring. These moments don’t come often, so when they do, we’re not about to get in our own way and slow the flow.
Hoping for a Flood (of Words)
In fact, it’s been awhile since I’ve had one myself, so maybe I’m due for a burst of creative fury when I can’t type fast enough to keep up with the words. When spelling and typing are cast to the wind in a mad rush to just get words on the screen. Forget trying to do it longhand. While I can write fairly quickly, it’s nothing compared to my typing, and I would be shredding the page in frustration. Besides, it’s easier to correct all the misspellings and typos when they’re on a screen in front of me with spellcheck engaged. Squiggly red lines or solid blue ones alert me to potential grammatical faux pas’.
Perhaps the temporary hiatus from humans will set off one of those floods, allowing me to knock down that towering list of To Do’s so I’ll feel less like I’m abandoning my responsibilities to go out for a bit and commune with humanity, perhaps to find a new source of inspiration. It would sure beat having the flu which took me completely out of commission and shot my productivity numbers down to zero!
Grateful for Every Little Thing
My gratitudes today are:
- I am grateful for the modicum of ability I’ve developed to actually stay on task until projects are completed.
- I am grateful for words that flow and cravings which subside while I’m getting things done and clearing space.
- I am grateful I’ve learned to clear space because new projects arise and things happen when I least expect it. Having some space cleared keeps the stress monsters away.
- I am grateful for new beginnings, and projects which return before I expect them.
- I am grateful for feelings of anticipation, even if I don’t know what they portend. I know it’ll be something good, and that’s all that matters.
- I am grateful for abundance; love, friendship, health, happiness, dancing, writing jobs, new things, opportunities, joy, peace, harmony, philanthropy, and prosperity.
Love and Light
About the Author
Sheri Conaway is a writer, blogger, ghostwriter, and advocate for cats. Sheri believes in the Laws , of Attraction, but only if you are a participant rather than just an observer. Her mission is to Make Vulnerable Beautiful and help entrepreneurs touch the souls of their readers and clients so they can increase their impact and their income. If you’d like to have her write for you, please visit her Hire Me page for more information. You can also find her on Facebook Sheri Levenstein-Conaway Author or in her new group, Putting Your Whole Heart Forward