Dancing outside my comfort zone

Thinking’s Missing Link

Dr. Seuss said it best, but Lewis Carroll had it right as well. We humans have incredible minds able to think extraordinary things, even 6 impossible things before breakfast! Humankind has made more advances in the last 100 years or so using that thinker, than in the rest of the documented centuries combined. And yet, we also keep repeating old lessons, never quite managing to integrate them into the structure of our world.

This ability has been called by many names in recent years: Laws of Attraction and Neuroplasticity just to name a couple. People are cashing on on our ability to think, and our inability to see it and take advantage of it. I, myself have spent thousands of dollars on webinars and books, trying to learn to harness my natural abilities. Crazy, right?

What Are We Doing Wrong?

We all manage to think, at least some of the time. What I think we lack is focus. And because we lack focus, we often fail to make the commitment to ourselves to see what we think through.

Take improving our health habits for instance. How many people have joined gyms, hired trainers, and bought all manner of equipment only to give up halfway through? How many of those expensive elliptical machines and treadmills are gathering dust or serving as clothes racks? How many self-help books and exercise videos are piled on a shelf or in a box, or even still in their shrink wrap?

Making a Commitment to the Most Important Person in Our Lives

The problem isn’t our inability to think. We can sit and do that for hours at a time! Our problem is our willingness to see a project through; to make a commitment. Not the kind we make to our kids, our spouse, or a job. This one hits much closer to home and is often the last to get our attention.

I’ve learned through painful experience that the hardest thing we can ever commit to is ourselves.

How many times have we said “I’ll do that when…” and “when” comes only after things like the kids growing up and getting through college. When comes after we’ve paid off this debt or that. When comes after we’ve honored commitments to our family, friends, jobs…in other words, when never comes. That is, unless we make it our first priority instead of our last.

So I’m learning to change the things that follow “when” to the ones that are for other people and things. I’m getting in shape now, because it’s what’s good for me. I’m writing more regularly because it’s good for me. I’m finishing some of the courses I bought months and years ago because…you guessed it. It’s good for me!

Committing to Yourself is Just the Tip of the Iceberg

All of this has given rise to an interesting side-effect. The more I concentrate on doing things for myself, the more time and energy I have to do other things which I’ve moved to the other side of “when”. Once I refused to allow myself to dishonor my self-commitment to working out 3 times a week, I miraculously found the time to write a blog post every couple of days. Desire resurfaced to complete the VA course I’d bought last year.

The whole thing is having a snowball effect. I’m cleaning out rooms and closets which have been dumping grounds for the detritus of my life for decades. GONE! I’ve cleared my desk and surrounding surfaces of clutter I swore I had to keep because I might need it someday. GONE!

When we make our commitment to ourselves first, we suddenly find we have an abundance of time for all the things we want to do. Why? Because we’re finally happy. We finally get to do things which satisfy our minds and our souls. Life isn’t a matter of getting through the tasks we have to do any more. It’s a matter of getting to do the things we love, so we’re happy to accommodate others and fulfill responsibilities to them as well.

If I Knew Then What I Know Now

If I could go back and give my teenage self a single piece of advice right now, I’d say Give yourself permission to do what you love, and commit yourself fully to doing that. Only then will you feel genuine pleasure in helping other people by doing things they ask of you. Only then will there be nothing you truly hate to do.

The light bulb went off for me when I realized I’d always dropped the ball when it came to committing to myself. Though I’m still very much a work-in-progress, I am certain I will continue to see positive changes and continued opportunities to live, learn, grow, and think the most amazing, fantastical things possible, the wildest and most impossible things, and then, make them happen. I hope if it hasn’t already, that light bulb will go off for you too. As I said to myself the day I finally decided to file for divorce: “Life is too short to be unhappy.” But only you can make yourself happy.

More and More Grateful Each Passing Day

My gratitudes tonight are:

  1. I am grateful for my epiphanies.
  2. I am grateful for all the lessons I’ve learned, and the ones I’m still learning.
  3. I am grateful for the commitment I’ve finally learned to make to myself.
  4. I am grateful for a refurbishment of priorities.
  5. I am grateful for the joy I feel that increases with each passing day.
  6. I am grateful for abundance; commitment to self, love, joy, happiness, progress, inspiration, motivation, productivity, prosperity, philanthropy, peace, harmony, and enlightenment.

Blessed Be

I invite you to visit my Facebook pages, Sheri Levenstein-Conaway Author and HLWT Accounting. Please also drop by my website, www.shericonaway.com and check out my Hire Me Page. I’ve created these pages as a means of positive affirmation and would be very grateful if you’d “like” them or leave a comment! Thank you!

Lightbulb photo courtesy of Julian Santacruz

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