Dancing outside my comfort zone

Keeping Hope Alive

Hope Will Always Spring Eternal

This week I was reminded of the power of hope. So many times in my life when things looked bleak, a tiny spark of hope kept me putting one foot in front of the other. So many times, my efforts seemed futile, but a single glimmer, a slim possibility of success kept me soldiering on.

Many have written about the power of hope, and likely just as many have trashed the concept. Yet, how many achievements would not have occurred? How many obstacles would not have been overcome were it not for hope?

It’s interesting to me that both love and hope are often called blind. Yet, what are they but taking gigantic leaps of faith that all will turn out for the best? How often do we enter into either one with no idea of the outcome, and nothing but trust in ourselves, in circumstances, and even in someone else that the end result will be amazing?

Trust is an Action Word

Long ago, I put my trust in the Universe. It’s not that I stand around waiting for everything I want to land in my lap. Instead, I believe I will achieve my heart’s desires, and that in many cases, the results will be wonderful beyond my most outlandish imaginings. But I trust that opportunities to achieve those desires will appear when I’m ready for them, and it’s up to me to not only be alert and recognize them, but to also put in the effort to make the next opportunity manifest.

Some days, it’s difficult to continue to keep that spark of hope alive. Some days, the darkness creeps in and frankly, scares the crap out of me. But every time things are at their darkest, I get a flash of insight, or an image of things to come, reminding me that as long as I keep hope alive in my heart, I will somehow find a way to keep moving forward, to keep my head above the rising water of despair.

Sometimes, You Just Have to Let Go

Over the years, I’ve seen many things come and go; friendships, a marriage, relationships, jobs, lifestyles…but the endings have one thing in common. Every single one left me open to something far better. Granted, some of those better things took years to actually show up, and often I wandered down a lot of dead-end roads on the way there. But the Universe hasn’t let me down. Not once.

These days, I’m really being pressed to keep the hope alive, to remind myself that what I’m experiencing is part of a greater plan. It’s not always easy. I’ve pared my life down until I live more leanly than I have since the days of a handful of cashews and a glass of wine for dinner. Yet I’m more at peace than I ever was.

I’m able to start my day on my own terms, reading, writing, and exercising 3 times a week. My stories are being told, one page at a time. My circle of friends is growing and includes many who are teaching me more about being a patient and compassionate human being. And I have plenty of days when I have only the companionship of my cats which is a good thing. They are my peace when I’ve had too much humanity.

Taking Time to Get to Know Myself

In the 3 years or so that I’ve withdrawn from the day-to-day routine of the working class, I’ve learned a lot about myself. I know that I need a lot of time to decompress from contact with humanity, even when the energy is compatible with mine. I know I’m more effective when some of my life is conducted on a schedule even though I go nuts when I’m always at someone else’s beck and call. I’ve even learned how to put myself on a schedule which works for me and allows time for creativity, physical activity,  and mental clarity but still allows some flexibility when life takes a hard right turn.

However, if I’ve learned one thing about hope, it’s that you need to infuse it with at least a modicum of common sense. If someone says “the house is burning and you have to get out now”, you don’t plant yourself on the floor and hope somehow it’ll burn all around you and leave you unharmed.

The same is true for those pesky interpersonal relationships I’ve been avoiding for so long. When the signs, signals, and even words are telling you it’s not going to happen, you have to trust that too. All too often I’ve turned a deaf ear on the words and ultimately made a fool out of myself. This goes for the red flags too. Ignore them at your peril. My personal favorites are men who are too charming, and those who drink excessively. Call me hypersensitive, but if it takes a guy more than one beer to relax and enjoy dancing with the ladies, he’s someone I’d do well to avoid beyond the superficiality of an occasional dance partner.

Taking a Step Back to See Where Hope is Still Viable

When it comes to life and career, I can honestly say I’m not seeing red flags at this point, nor do I believe I’m ignoring any signs or signals telling me to turn back or get the hell out of this place I’m in. Instead, I’m getting some wonderful insight from many directions, a lot of encouragement to keep scribbling, and the same strong feeling I had 3 years ago that this is the direction my life needs to take. And of course, I’m getting the occasional nudge which leads to posts like this. And no small percentage of posts like this are finding their way in one form or another into Forgotten Victims.

Writing here has become my brain dump, my sounding board and my practice space. I put words together in different ways, eventually finding the combinations which feel most comfortable to me.

Remembering Always to be Grateful

Tonight’s gratitudes are:

  1. I am grateful for this outlet. Brain dumps are being elevated by sending them here.
  2. I am grateful for the choices I’ve made and the ones I’ve yet to make.
  3. I am grateful for the continuing inspiration triggered by diet, exercise, and an ever-expanding circle of friends and acquaintances.
  4. I am grateful for my time alone. It makes me appreciate the time spent with other people.
  5. I am grateful for abundance; friendship, love, inspiration, motivation, healthy habits, joy, hope, peace, harmony, prosperity, and philanthropy.

Blessed Be

I invite you to visit my Facebook pages, Sheri Levenstein-Conaway Author and HLWT Accounting. Please also drop by my website, www.shericonaway.com and check out my Hire Me Page. I’ve created these pages as a means of positive affirmation and would be very grateful if you’d “like” them or leave a comment! Thank you!

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