Dancing outside my comfort zone

Why Do I Even Bother Making Decisions These Days?

Yesterday, I made the decision to stop chasing the almighty buck, but more importantly, to stop worrying about what I do and don’t have. My plan was to focus on the revisions I need to do for my three current projects. Twenty-four hours later, I’m shaking my head in bafflement.

Yes, I got to the gym and did a really good leg workout (yay, me!) and I didn’t spend time searching for jobs to either write or pitch. I did, however, read a couple of blog posts about setting up my author page more effectively so that I’m presenting myself as a writer instead of just some random blogger. Since I have both a website and a blog, this wasn’t as complicated as it might seem…well, except for one thing. I’m still learning WordPress so when the suggestion to put buttons for my social media accounts on all pages of my website piqued my interest (and notice that I spelled it correctly. It irks me that people still think the proper spelling is ‘peeked’ or ‘peaked’. Different words people!) Um. sorry. Grammar police must have slipped past my wards.

As I was saying, when the suggestion to put social media buttons on my site piqued my interest, I went in search of a way to accomplish what should have been a mundane task. Instead, I found that you have to choose your social media button plug-in wisely as each has its own strengths and weaknesses, but also, they don’t all do what I wanted it to do. The first one only offered buttons for Facebook and Twitter unless I wanted to spend $30. The second also had add in buttons…for a price. But my diligence was rewarded as I finally found one which had more than I needed, but all that I wanted. But the trial and error which started with simply trying to change the theme to one which had the buttons took me about four hours. This seems to be the rule any time I want to change something on my website. Just as Target is the $200 store, Costco is the $500 store and Kohl’s is in the $200-300 range, the WordPress website is the four hour time sucker store. I suppose I could read the documentation, but all of that computerese has me wanting to poke my eyes out in a matter of minutes. I just can’t seem to find anything which gives me exactly what I want, simply and in plain English.

Trial and Error Does Have its Advantages

Though I’m convinced that maintaining my sanity is clearly not the objective of computer programmers and their technical writers, having to learn this stuff the hard way means that I really get a feel for how the software works. Being one who came up from the Stone Age where accounting was done in giant ledger books and painstakingly transferred from voluminous journals, I’ve spent a lot of time learning software. I’d like to say that all of the fancy operating systems have made the process easier, but somehow, it has created a lunatic competition among programmers to create software which does everything we could possibly want (and a few things we don’t) but takes a genius to set up. At times I feel as if I’m still reading “See Jack run” while everyone around me is reading:

A controversial quantum theory of consciousness called “Orch OR” (which stands for “orchestrated objective reduction”) recently had a review, and the scientists supporting this idea are claiming the recent discovery of quantum vibrations in “microtubules” inside brain neurons corroborates their beliefs.

 

(excerpt borrowed from a February 4, 2015 post in the Inquisitr

Nevertheless, I continue to poke and prod at the software before me, determined to somehow force it into the shape I desire. Today, it was Sheri-1, Software-0, but believe me, that’s not always the case. In fact, if I were in a position to pay someone to do the whole thing, I might just do it. And thus, the Universe sets things up so that I learn something valuable in spite of myself. I also get to make discoveries I wouldn’t otherwise make which lead me to changes and improvements I might not have requested in my ignorance. I grudgingly admit that everything is happening just as it is supposed to.

Though I can look at my To Do list and see that I’ve marked off more things than I realize this week, I have yet to do any writing, editing or revising, beyond a couple of blog posts.

But getting back to the point of this post, I let go of my efforts to develop a revenue stream from my writing to re-focus my attention on the projects I already have and wouldn’t you know, as soon as I did, I learn that a friend and potential future client wants to refer me to someone for editing work. I guess it’s a good thing that, despite it all, I’ve been altering my website to better serve me as a place where future clients can find me, see the services I can provide and even find contact information!

Evolution: A Continuing Theme

In the months leading up to my crazy leap of faith whereby I quit my job and started acting like a full-time writer (I’ve become an expert at procrastination!), I was seeing changes in my life, in my attitude and my beliefs. I found myself using the word “evolution” frequently. In that regard, little has changed. I continue to evolve. My life continues to change. There’s been a huge amount of trial and error and no shortage of small victories along the way. The errors lead me to small tweaks. The small tweaks either bring me the desired results or lead to further tweaks. And more often than not, the results I thought I wanted don’t end up being what I receive in the end, and I can honestly say, I’m happy with the altered results and expectations. I’m still not entirely sure what the Universe’s plans are for me, but I have no doubt that I will enjoy, not only the destination, but the journey.

My gratitudes tonight are:
1. I am grateful that I enjoy embracing change.
2. I am grateful for the twists and turns in my path which lead to wonderful new discoveries.
3. I am grateful for the opportunities I’m given to push past my own limitations and expand my personal universe.
4. I am grateful for the safe return of my son-in-law after over nine months of deployment.
5. I am grateful for abundance: change, lessons, discoveries, opportunities, love, joy, happiness, peace, harmony, health, prosperity and philanthropy.

Blessed Be

I hope you’ll take a moment to visit my Facebook pages at https://www.facebook.com/SheriLevensteinConawayAuthor?ref=aymt_homepage_panel and https://www.facebook.com/HLWTAccounting . Please also drop by my website, http://www.shericonaway.com and check out my Hire Me Page. I’ve created these pages as a means of positive affirmation and would be very grateful if you’d “like” them or leave a comment! Thank you!

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Comments on: "June 3, 2015 Letting Go?" (2)

  1. I admire your perseverance. Some days you work on the main theme, other days the back story. Yesterday was a back story day :))

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    • You’ve hit on it exactly. But some days, I just wallow and fret over how far I haven’t gotten. Then, I smack myself on the head and turn my focus back to what I have accomplished instead. The real trick is to keep frustration at bay an keep moving forward even if the steps are tiny.

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