Dancing outside my comfort zone

My name is Sheri and I’m a blog-a-holic

It has been four days since my last post, and my only excuse is that I allowed myself to be overwhelmed by a task. I was nominated for a Liebster award which is essentially designed to help folks like me boost their blog traffic. Unfortunately, the current version going around requires that I tag 11 other bloggers, and I just got stuck on that as either those I visit with regularly have already been nominated or I need to go back into my archives to see where I’ve commented. With accounting work to catch up and pieces to critique, I just shoved the whole thing to the back burner.

I realize that pushing a project to a back burner is about as effective as using alcohol to get rid of worrisome thoughts, I’m still guilty of…what’s that onerous word? Oh, yes, procrastination. That insidious pastime has had me playing stupid computer games again instead of working on my writing, and made me sigh with relief when my critique group’s next meeting was pushed out to March, giving me time to gather all of the versions of my children’s book together to see which one or ones I need to merge to make a reasonably presentable submission for my turn as the critiquee.

Thankfully, all bad things must come to an end

Yet, the writer in me says “thou shalt write, read or pursue activities related to such on a regular basis lest thee fall into the dreaded depths of ennui.” So I start with my sadly neglected blog and move on to one of my other projects.

At yesterday’s Inklings meeting we were again discussing how some of us can have several projects going at once (or, in my case, several books being read while pursuing several different projects). Part of it is the ADD/ADHD nature of many of the writers, part of it is that some of us have learned to turn off the logical/editorial part of our brains, but for me, most of it is simply that I have the time to do so now. Granted, I have always needed multiple projects to keep my brain happy, but actually pursuing all of them with any success is far easier when I don’t have a boss breathing down my neck and actually expecting me to show up for work every day! I am free to spend the daylight hours going to the gym, running errands and even on rare occasions, meeting a friend for lunch, because I seem to be happier working late into the night. This past week, I either read, worked on client accounting, critiqued or wrote until well after midnight nearly every night. (Two of those nights turned into mornings, barely an hour or two before daylight!) Frankly, some of my most productive writing sessions started after 10PM and ended around 3 or 4AM. Maybe that’s why I dream so vividly. Those stories really want to come out in the hours typically given over to human dream time. Maybe I was a cat in a past life?

I’ve read a lot about finding the time you work best, and know that mine is late at night. These days, even dancing doesn’t interfere as my peak hours are after I’ve finished my twice weekly (and sometimes more) dose of aerobics and socialization. Sure, some weeks are more productive than others, and sometimes, the need to research and study becomes more important than simply getting words on a page. One of the things I’ve learned after many years of self-therapy to rid myself of the counterproductive habit known as ‘beating myself up’, is that there are many forms of productivity and each is necessary at one point or another. To berate myself because I spent twelve hours reading instead of writing is not only pointless, but hinders further productivity while I salve the ego I bruised with self-flagellation. Sometimes age actually does bring us wisdom!

A feeling a peace and relief now permeates my being

This simple act, this writing of a blog post is what I needed to get back on track. As a junkie needs a fix, I need to post, to write, to share my convoluted thoughts and observations in order to maintain my equilibrium. In part, it is because I am not constrained by following a plot line or making my characters dynamic and believable. This, then, is the brain dump I used to do on the nights I couldn’t sleep. It’s the social connection I am so clumsy about in person. I speak to you and hope that sometimes, what I say makes a connection and causes you to think as well, to find what best works for you and allows you to pursue the things which feed your soul.

My gratitudes today are:
1. I am grateful that I was given the gift of gab, at least in print, to help align my thoughts and fulfill my needs.
2. I am grateful for the company of my cats as, despite my loner tendencies, I would not do well completely alone. I can do without humans for a long period of time, but not without company.
3. I am grateful for beautiful, sunshiny winter days when I can open the windows and let the cats chirp at the birds.
4. I am grateful for the re-opening of the children’s story I wrote for my daughters. I now face the challenge of pulling all of the versions together into a cohesive whole.
5. I am grateful for abundance: love, life, health, happiness, joy, writing, friendship (even if I’m a difficult friend at times), opportunities, inspiration, productivity and prosperity.

Namaste

Advertisements

Tag Cloud

%d bloggers like this: