Dancing outside my comfort zone

Oh my goodness!  What an amazing night of dancing!! And it was great fun dancing in a costume this year.  OK, so it was pretty much in character, it was still a costume!  So many creative people again this year!  We had a bullrider and her rodeo clown, complete with bull and barrel, a few pimps and Robin Hoods, the ugliest good fairy I have EVER seen who stood next to the dance floor guzzling beer from a pitcher, a couple of girls in poodle skirts, a spider and her fly, Little Red Riding Hood and the Wolf, devils and vampires…oh I could go on and on!  Halloween is always so much fun at Borderline, and I always enjoy running around, taking pictures.  Of course, when the younger crowd starts coming in around 9:30, the amount of clothing worn diminishes rapidly!  I think a few of the older guys hang around just to see the show!!  Naughty nurses and schoolgirls seem to make old guys crazy! 🙂 

I manage about a 50 minute meditation this afternoon until Toby decided that I would make a good bed provided I also skritch him just so.  I focused, at the beginning on sending love and light to the ex contractor in hopes that he would stop texting me, thinking that I’d actually do anything to help him out of the predicament he got himself into by being unscrupulous.  On the good side, I had a very nice meditation with some interesting visuals.  But on the down side, the moron texted me again before I left for Borderline, but the real kicker was the ones I got after I got there.  After telling me earlier in the day that he would put my name on his bankruptcy (as well he should since I am, essentially, a creditor), he actually sent me a text telling me that, since he liked me, he was going to give me until Monday to change my mind about helping him out.  Seriously???? I’m becoming convinced that he left his brains in an ash tray back in the 60’s!    But I realized that responding to his texts was just giving him false hope, so I have responded to his pleas for the last time.  I suspect that there will be some abuse before long when he realizes that he cannot manage to cajole me into forgetting about the lies he’s been telling and the nonsense he’s been pulling for over a year now.  I told him that he’d made his bed and should now lie in it like a man.  I won’t tell him again.  I guess there are some people who learn from their mistakes and others who can’t even admit to themselves that they erred.  Do they go through their life making the same mistakes over and over and just shifting the blame to someone else?  Do they ever learn the lesson or do they come back, lifetime after lifetime, repeating themselves for eternity?  Wouldn’t it be kinder to just bring them back as a water buffalo for a change, and let them live a life of service, and of having the crap kicked out of them when they don’t perform? 

I don’t profess to understand all of the machinations of the Universe.  But I do know that love begets love and crap begets crap.  But if you don’t recognize crap for what it is, how can you ever get away from it to find the love?  I refuse to believe that some souls are destined to always live with crap and never with love.  There had to be some point in their lives when they did something worth saving. 

I suppose the solution for me is to continue sending him love and light and hope that some of it finally gets through.  I can help him that way because I know that giving him what he thinks he wants right now would not help him at all because removing the consequence denies him the chance to learn the lesson and move on to something new and different.

Tonight’s gratitudes are:
1. I am grateful that I am able to learn the lessons put before me.
2. I am grateful that I was given a sense of humor, albeit warped, with which to view life and it’s twists and turns.
3. I am grateful for all of the loving that has come into my life, and will never, ever take it for granted!
4. I am grateful for another fun and long night of dancing.
5. I am grateful for my thin legs which remind my body of the fitness it is achieving, one day at a time.

Love and light.

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